Sunday, November 22, 2009

creative knot

carefully he circled it
the rope in his hands
a burden for him
that tree felt so like home

he chose the second lowest branch
flung the rope over it-
checked if it would hold
sat down to have a smoke

he had made neat packets
kissing each one tenderly
placed those under the tree
save for one, which went back

into the pocket of his coat
having no second thoughts
he held that rope again
and tied a precise knot

a work of beauty-
his last creative work,
and his last thoughts before
life was snucked from him


30 comments:

b said...

Why did this make me gasp? I suppose it is because you wrote the perfect poem.

b

http://torristravels.blogspot.com/2009/11/beauty-before-function.html

Lilly said...

Beautiful imagery.

Loch Rob said...

Nicely done. I was hoping from the beginning, the rope was not for him.

Maggie said...

This was quite a piece to read and very visual.

gs batty said...

Deadly beauty much like a sexy worman

Rinkly Rimes said...

I could see it coming, of course, but it was still very powerful.

Jeeves said...

So well written. the end had the usual punch.

PS the Pratsie said...

speechless !

anthonynorth said...

Powerful with a great ending.

Lorraine said...

So beautiful these last moments, then reality takes over...I don't know how you this, the perfect intimate, painful, heartwrenching moment....

Did I mention I missed you?

SandyCarlson said...

Powerful. A challenging interpretation of creativity. Well done.

Linda Jacobs said...

The line "That tree felt so like home" put a lump in my throat when I got to it. I knew what was coming and that just made the rest of the poem more emotional. Well done!

Amias said...

You made the "suicide" of this person a very creative event, it was so visual it took me back to when a friend committed suicide. She tried several times, and each time she was saved. On her last attempt, she put a gun in her mouth and blew her brains out.

As I was reading this most creative line, "that tree felt so like home", I wondered if the gun felt like home to her.

Sorry about this raw emotion your poem conjured up, but so it is with good poetry.

Don Iannone said...

As they say, give a man (or woman) enough rope...

Great one Gautami. Loved it. Thanks for your visit. My photography work has overtaken my poetry in the past year, but now the poetry is coming back.

gautami tripathy said...

Amias: I seldom respond to any comment on my blog.

As you must have observed, I write about raw emotions. It might pertain to anything. Actually I had something else in my mind when I wrote this, but it took its own course. Sometimes poetry does that.

I am very sorry about your friend. I too have lost at least two of my friends to suicide and not to forget those students, who too kill themselves. The pain, the helplessness doesn't go away. Never for a teacher or a friend.

There never should be a point of no return. No matter what.

Amias said...

I relate to your emotional poetry, about anything and everything! You are very talented and I enjoy your creativity.

namingconstellations said...

Wow... I had a suspicion where this was going when you started off, and it still just totally floored me. This is excellent, powerful, anguished, astonishing, and so many other adjectives at once. Definitely a unique take on "creativity", and perfectly accomplished.

keiths ramblings said...

Was I the only person NOT seeing what was coming? Stunning!

oldegg said...

Painfully beautiful.

Tumblewords: said...

I hoped he'd change his mind. Nice work!

Amity Me said...

OMG! ...this is creative suicide Gautami!

held my breath on the last stanza, huh!

great take on the prompt dear!

good morning!

Dee Martin said...

I hate suicide. Your writing is as always, perfection.

PassionMust said...

wow - awesome writing and a very creative usage of the prompt

Beth P. said...

Dear Gautami,
The loving nature of how your protagonist prepared himself, the rope, the tree and those who would find the packets. Sometimes there are worse things than a well-thought through death. Maybe a life that is so full of suffering that no light can penetrate.

This was beautifully done. Kudos on your always creative interpretations of prompts...and your life.

Bill said...

after midnight
my solitude
becpmes loneliness

fourwindshaiga said...

Well, damn. Good poem, though.

Cassiopeia Rises said...

Wow, Tami I did not expect this ending. Very powerful. I am sure there were many gasps after reading this great poem.


love, Melanie

Tammie Lee said...

amazingly creative piece.
Vast Mystery

Patti said...

Your poem is a very creative take on the prompt- excellently written~

gabrielle said...

“he had made neat packets
kissing each one tenderly
placed those under the tree
save for one, which went back

into the pocket of his coat”

No callous act, or slipshod work. You have transformed his final act into a graceful thing of beauty.
If one could think of a suicide as a tender mercy, this would be it.