Saturday, December 25, 2010

solemnity marred by hilarity

I stood there outside, in that cold
but feeling the warm of happy people
I don't know what I was waiting for
but definitely not him
did you see that?
the white-bearded fat man rolled through
the church doors broke apart from his weight
the solemn occasion was marred by hilarity
when the fat man groaned
I ran towards him
I couldn't believe what I heard?
he wanted a comb to groom his hair
the reindeer laughed while he fumbled
they were busy checking his manifesto
"was his fall in the agenda of that day?"

37 comments:

Judie said...

A very clever take on the prompt!! Good work!!

Ramesh Sood said...

I enjoyed this as it made me smile.. whatever be the situation.. looks are important..

Thanks Gautami, for it has been a very timely prompt for me.. as it coincides with what actually happened with me last week..hope I have done justice to the prompt..

Planning another entry as some other thoughts are germinating too..

jeff campbell said...

Very nice Gautami ;-) Much more upbeat than mine...Peace and blessings

gs batty said...

old fat men do fall down and according to my wife they really do need to comb their hair.
enjoyed a good chuckle with my morning coffee.

Dazee Dreamer said...

that was great. old fat men, and me, we are great faller downers. :)

5thsister said...

And when fat men go down...they go down hard!

Love your centus. Merry Christmas!

cj Schlottman said...

This is very clever! I got a great laugh from this great post.

Namaste..........cj

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

You're so creative! I love this.
Have a wonderful holiday season. xo

Viki said...

I always love your unique takes on the prompt. Great job with this one.

Jim said...

Hi Tami, this makes me smile. I'm still smiling, :). Poor Santa, yes he may need a comb sometimes. My beard I keep short so that a brush will do.

Thank you for the nice prompt. I did a 'fast write' tonight. Even so it tells what came to my mind.
..

noexcuses said...

I love your writing! Nice job!

Ames said...

An unfortunate landing via an impromtu visit from Santa. Cute!~Ames

Nanka said...

Nice one but felt sorry for the old man. :)

Rek said...

a good one....the heaviest falls the hardest I guess....maybe he should gift himself an exercise bike....

Gemma @ Greyscale said...

A wonderful quirky view of Santa bumbling around tradition!! Fascinating!

jfb57 said...

A different view of Santa here!

Lilibeth said...

poor fat man without a comb

LeiffyV said...

Ah, a good take on the jolly old fat man of our youth. I am sure my father would have appreciated this since he was a Santa himself. Well done with this offering, made me feel really good! Thanks for sharing with us!

Sweetest in the Gale said...

This one made me smile! Very clever take.

Beth Camp said...

How creative -- what a neat poem that brings us right to the understanding of person and place. I loved your old man Santa!

annell said...

I liked that! And thanks for your comment. Good to know about the traditions!

ρομπερτ said...

How very interesting to read / see the picture you did create.

Please have a good new week.

daily athens

Tgoette said...

Very creative take! Great job!

Merry Christmas!

The Write Girl said...

What a clever poem and quite funny...I can picture this quite vividly. Nicely written.

Linda May said...

HMmm, I must think of things differently to your other fans 'cos this made me think that the happy people in the church were expecting something from Santa but you wanted to give him something instead by helping him. That is nice but the others, the church goers, disturbed me.

Rallentanda said...

I think you may be confusing Santa with the Archbishop of Canterbury with reference to the hair and comb dept:)Irreverent and funny!

Sumit Sarkar said...

Very well done with the proompt..
It was a fun read :)

Rumya said...

A fun read with a lot of imagery, Gautami.

Lisa said...

Perfect and clever take on this prompt. Always a pleasure to read your work.

flaubert said...

Gautami
I got a good laugh out of this.
Pamela

JanePoet ~ Deborah said...

a fun one!

Jo said...

such a wonderfully clever take on the prompt ... i did feel bad for the old guy

June Freaking Cleaver said...

Naughty reindeer, laughing at his fumbling! I hope he was able to get up and restore his dignity, poor fellow.

ladynimue said...

wow .. this was lovely !! i had a good laugh on it :) Thanks for spreading cheer with your words :)

JanePoet ~ Deborah said...

love your poem here and the one on the OSI site ... Happy New Year!

JanePoet ~ Deborah

Anna said...

You are amazing! Such a cleverly written poem. Good use of the prompt.

But I don't know whether to laugh or cry. It makes me think of my father in the last years of his life. He was big and fat and had a spinal condition that made it hard for him to stand or walk. He sat in a wheel chair toward the end, but did his best pull himself up and stand at least once, each day.

He could fall. One time it took my mother, my sister-in-law, my two nieces and me to get him back in the wheel chair, using a lift. He laughed and enjoyed the attention we gave him. We were glad that he had fallen gently this time and did not break anything.

Your poem has veils of meaning to different people, that you may not be aware of yourself.
Such good writing!

Best wishes,
Anna

Anna's SC#34

Jenny said...

You. Are. Amazing.

This is the coolest use of this prompt! Something I would never have imagined in a million years.

I totally love how you did this.

Wishing you plenty of time for word crafting in 2011! You are really a master of it.

Thank you for linking.