Sunday, June 17, 2012

under the surface

Changla: Photo stolen from Suchismita's FB page!!
is there anybody there
not a trace I see
in the cracks of subliminal temper
such a racket
who hid the strings
where is the spare
buried in the snow
my chest saves the draft
such a temper
what did it latch to?
I stop myself from a refrain
can't anyone see me me blend in
does it not strike to someone
all that waiting might have killed me?
has it really been a decade
in my current state?

"I will come out anytime
hit back hard upside down-
those big stones helping me"

18 comments:

joanne said...

When I tried to clearly understand some poetry, I was told to let the words wash over me, and then I would understand - not on an intellectual level, but emotional.....I let your wonderful words wash...

Mary said...

Sometimes the wait is hard, and there is the same refrain often repeats! You managed very well to combine several prompts.

I will share a link to one of mine hoping you will visit:

http://inthecornerofmyeye.blogspot.com/2012/06/renegade.html

brenda w said...

The last stanza reminds me of birth. Excellent write, it washes under the surface. :)

Ramesh Sood said...

I enjoyed it..read it few times..to make it sink..it is always such an intellectual feast here... always..thank..

flaubert said...

Gautami, reading this I forgot it was wordle. Nice one.

Pamela

gsb said...

yes...I beg of you come out but please don't hit me with the stones...although, I will accept being tumbled about by a few words...

Sherry Blue Sky said...

You have done so well with the wordle........nice to see you at the Pantry, this Sunday morning.

Anonymous said...
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Myrna R. said...

I like the metaphor of coming out from the cold, even if upside down, to face the world. Nice write. Enjoyed.

Kim Nelson said...

Yikes! I felt the fear, the tremulous desire to move forth... or not.

Semaphore said...

What makes us human is our ability to raise ourselves up against adversity, where we had previously been struck down, again and again.

my heart's love songs said...

a wonderful job of combining the prompts into a cohesive poem with the feelings running through it from beginning to end. ♥

Brian Miller said...

whatever it takes to overcome, that is what me must muster

good luck with that mary

Daydreamertoo said...

Sometimes it seems too hard and too much to do to climb back up and start all over again and yet, yes, we must do it.
Feel the tension in this for sure. A good write.

kolembo said...

What a gorgeous image...!

Elizabeth said...

Starting over sounds so simple, but it seldom is. Your poem speaks to the courage needed to do so. And I must agree with Pamela, I forgot this was a wordle. Thank you,

Elizabeth

Tumblewords: said...

Sometimes it's almost more than a person can handle! Wonderful piece.

SandyCarlson said...

Wonderful, indeed.