Thursday, August 31, 2006

Blog day?

I didn't know that. Thanks to ghost particle, I know it now.

So here I go and visit 5 bloggers, I have not visited before this.

What I coincidence I wrote about my blogger friends yesterday.

Here are the five blogs I visited for the first time:




I'm The Naked Nerd

Jon Cox

I visited them today and glad I did and will make sure I interact with them.

Adding another:


Wednesday, August 30, 2006

My blogger friends

Over the last few months, I have made many friends over the net. A few fizzled out after initial euphoria but there are some which I feel will be of the lasting nature.

Blogging has helped me in making friends with people whom I wouldn't have met otherwise. We go and visit each others blogs whenever we want to, without any obligation whatsover. One gets different perceptions. No one judgemental of the others' post or way of thinking. We respect each others space. We even support each other in times of need. We are all different, in culture, religion, country etc etc. I am enriched by knowing them, knowing about them.

Starting with no particular order I must mention a few of the blogs I visit and learnt much. darius's gospels are full of knowledge and wit. So is his occasional poetry.

fills me with positivity. He is kind and writes poetry which have always good words to say. Cheerful and much needed. I am blessed for knowing him.

donn Coppens otherwise known as homo escapeons' posts really hilarious stuff. On the whole, his posts appear witty but those are done in such a way that one can get to the underlying irony. I have gained much from his posts. He takes us all over the world. His blog is a journey of sorts.

About within without what can I really say? I like to be on his space ship. Thats about it all.

There are a few who visit me and leave encouraging comments. ghost particle is one friend who has always been there.

Ashish has not commented on any my posts but I have linked his blog to mine and do visit him and read his posts. He too is very informative and his rants are a pleasure to read. He writes serious stuff which hit the nail on the head!

For those I left out, I think they deserve a separate post. I will come back with that in a few days.

Thanks you all for being there. Just your presence makes me feel so happy. I am very glad I know you all.

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Open letter to my bereaved SIL

I don't have words to express. I can only understand your suffering. I can imagine how you are feeling right now. This deep sadness, this sense of loss can never be fully comprehended unless one has experienced it. I can only offer you mere words. Nothing will soothe your heart for some time now. I can only share your thoughts if you care enough to share them with me. I will be there for you in spirit as I can't be there with you right now. You have to go too. To be with your mom, your siblings. They need you. You need them too.

Your dad wouldn't have wanted you to be sad. Yes, he is gone. You will miss him. No one take the place of our parents. But remember he always wanted the best for you. He did not suffer. He just went away quietly. He did not make you all suffer. Becos if he had suffered, you would have suffered too.

Now it seems impossible but the pain will lessen with time, you will only remember the love you shared. You will miss him no doubt but you will live too.

As you are aware, we do miss our dad. But we have good memories to tide us through. So will you. Do remember that we all love you too.

I pray for him. May his soul rest in peace......


My eldest brother's wife's(sister-in-law) dad passed away today a while back. She is in Bangalore and her dad was in Bhubaneswar. As I cannot hold her, I can only be with her in spirit. At this moment she is in no state to talk to us.

Monday, August 28, 2006

Just few broken lines

Will it get us anywhere?

Blame game;
Why start all that?

Only pulls us down.

Push it away,
I want positive force;
to be completely filled by it,
no matter what...

This is no poetry. Only I was thinking aloud about something someone wrote in a blog. Isn't it easy to preach others? If we take difference of opinion as opposing then all of us we have a lot to learn. I include myself in there too. Becos no one individual is more or no one individual is any less. We have our different perceptions, different interpretations. Opposing does not mean we become adversaries. We can still be acquaintances while thinking diametrically. We seldom apply the same rules for ourselves.

Negative energy can only destroy us. I am filling myself with positive energy. The net is a very big place. We can all survive without getting into each others toes....We need not even acknowledge each other if we don't want to.

Kind of prose written in broken lines. Scattered....

Sunday, August 27, 2006


first they said,"it's nine."
all of us said, "ok fine."

then they said,"twelve it is."
we said,"whatever you please."

now they insist it's eight,
deciding demise was its fate.

stripped of its pride of place,
pluto shunted out with disgrace!


I had finished teaching my students about the universe. Then Pluto was declared a non-planet. Very frankly, with all that media hype and most going overboard about its current status, I was simply bored and thought we are being paranoid. But after what one of my student's said, asking me, "what do we write in the ensuing exams, I wrote this. I found her question a valid one. For an eleven year old, its very confusing. Its written from her point of view. At least the first 6 lines. Kids do ask, now what?

I have been asked why did I write after saying, we are getting paranoid about it.
My answer is:

Why can't I write about it too?
Whats/who's really stopping me?

People write about love even without wanting to or hating all the while....

Thursday, August 24, 2006


After crying my heart out
Suddenly I was calm

Now thinking of that lout
I don't give a damn


Here I am attemping Dorothy Parker kind of poetry! "Attempt" is the operative word. Chk out her poetry here.

This did happen to me a short while ago. It took sometime for me to realise it, what kind of person he was. I sincerely hope HE gets to read this.

Friday, August 18, 2006

At what cost?..disturbing thought

Another bright day. Infact too bright. I go to the central park of our apartments where the flag hoisting is done with all solemnity. A short speech by the RWA president. Children sing patriotic songs.Jalebis and Samosas are served as it has been done for all those 12 years I have lived here.There are various competitions for the children...painting, essay writing, sports etc etc. It goes on and on. Nothing seems to have changed. Apart from the fact I am older and most adolescents of yesteryears now have kids of their own.

Post lunch..I venture out to go to India Gate. Now the rude awakening. Though there is hardly any traffic on the roads where you go, you see policemen and/or defence personnel searching all vehicles. They even body search a few. Thoroughly check the belongings too. All my enthusiasm is lost by this time. At last we are told no one can go near India Gate. Imagine that. In all the 30 odd years I have lived in Delhi, we have always been free to move anywhere in Delhi.

I realise there has been threats of terrorist attacks on all major landmarks , malls, Cinema Halls,temples,national monuments etc in Delhi. We do need these security checks. We cannot take any risks. But at what cost? We are living in constant fear. The government wants us to stay home. We are not free to move anywhere we want. Worst, at few places we can't even carry water as liquids in any form are not allowed.

Finally I realise that haven't we played into the hands of terrorists? They have achieved their goal. They do not even need bombs. Killing and maiming innocents is not what works best. Fear factor works just as well...more so for the govt and the security agencies. The common man just wants the freedom to move as he desires.

Feeling afraid is normal becos we care for our loved ones. We worry for their safety. We should not give in to it though. We should not let fear become part of our lives. We have to find ways and means to deal with it.

All I ask, will it ever end or terror will become a way of life for us? Disturbing thought that....

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Ref: how do you define porn?

Chk here. This is another link which opens without registering. Sorry for the previous one. Please do let me know if you think its porn...the photo as well as poem. The reactions in this network are vastly different from what what it was in the other one.

After my work being called "execrable porn"...I wish I could really write porn!


Monday, August 14, 2006

Why don't I feel elated?

15th August. Yet another Independence day. It is the 59th one. But why don't I feel any happier? Being in a school, we celebrate all such days. But this year why did I take a leave?

Why didn't I feel any enthusiasm to dress up for the occasion? In schools we celebrate independence day on the 14th Aug by hoisting our tricolour flag, singing patriotic songs etc. This year it fell on a monday after two holidays, followed by two more holidays on 15th Aug and Janmashtami(Lord Krishna's Birthday) on the 16th. Hence two holidays before it and two after it. I took a leave so as to have a five days break. I needed it. Why did I feel so tired and depressed? And morose?

All that I am doing is sleep and read and watch TV. Delhi has become a fort due to all those security measures. There has been threats of terrorists attack on all major landmarks, malls, temples, markets. Where does one go? Why does one feel so insecure in ones own country?

Havn't the terrorists achieved their goal? By keeping us all inside our homes. They have kind of got hold of the whole of the country. For that matter the whole world. At no place one feels free or secure.

To top it all, there has been long power cuts, 8-10 hours. How long does back-up hold? Now they say it will be like this for the next 15 days or so. That too in the capital of India, Delhi.

Is it any surprise that I don't fell happy or anything remotely like that?

How do you define porn?

How do you define porn?

I am asking this because I posted, infact re-posted one of my erotic poems in a network with a picture. It was dubbed as porn there. When I had posted it for the first time without the photo, it hadn't aroused any such reactions. Now it has. I totally fail to understand. I never remotely thought of it as porn, neither the poem nor the picture. What do you think? You can chk it here. The poem as well as the picture.

One thing I know for sure, the people who have "holier than thou" attitude are the ones who surf the net for porns.

I have always protested against the coterie in that particular network. And impersonations. Now I think they are getting back at me like this....LOL!

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Book Review--Labyrinth by Kate Mosse

I finished reading yet another book about the holy grail. It seems to be one of the favourite topic for most writers. Coming after The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown, this book holds on its own. This is Kate Mosse's third novel.

In this elaborate thriller Labyrinth, two women strangly mysteriously linked across eight centuries, take up the search to find the legendary Holy Grail and guard its secrets from those who would use its power for evil ends. Kate Mosse spins an electrifying story of intrigue and hazard, with female characters who don't wait for men to lead. With valour and shrewdness, they plunge headlong into the everlasting search for truth. In this grail quest, women aren't helpless creatures to be rescued by knights in shining armour. They hold on their own, are central to the action, with the capability to change the course of history. The villains, in both eras too, are women. The climactic moments where the good and evil women are face to face and fight it out is very gripping...

Story in a nutshell:

July 1209: in Carcassonne, France, a young girl is given one of the three secret books, by her father which he claims contains the secret of the true Grail. Although Alaïs cannot understand the strange words and symbols hidden within, she memorises them and knows that she must protect it. It takes great sacrifice and lots of faith on her part to keep the secret of the labyrinth safe - a secret that stretches back thousands of years to the deserts of Ancient Egypt . . .

July 2005: Alice Tanner, a British Volunteer, stumbles upon two skeletons during an archaeological dig in the mountains outside Carcassonne. Inside the hidden cave where two skeletons lie crumbling, she experiences an overwhelming sense of malevolence, as well as a creeping understanding and familiarity. She can somehow make sense of the mysterious ancient words carved into the rock. Though she cannot comprehend fully, Alice realises she is trapped in a terrifying sequence of events for which she has no control and her destiny is somehow linked with the fate of the Cathars 800 years before.

Their stories are told in alternating chapters as both take utmost care to hide and protect their secrets. As history unfolds over the centuries, both find themselves entangled in the history and evil that surrounds them. The novel moves between past and present, one life reflecting and mirroring the other. Most of the characters in both eras are mirrored.

As one might expect of a labyrinth, it turns out that there are truths beyond the truths sought. There are twists and turns, memories to be retrieved and reclaimed, lovers' misunderstandings to be reconciled, fragments of the past to be salvaged and old betrayals to be, very satisfyingly, revenged. It has all these and more ingredients for a good novel.

Mosse's love of the location around Carcassonne is clear from her generous descriptions of the city and the surrounding countryside; and her research into the details of the historical facts and language is markedly wide-ranging. The novel does hold attention till the end despite some loose ends.

Monday, August 07, 2006

Who am I?

I always ask myself, who am I? What am I? Why am I in this world? These are some of the questions, we seldom find answers to. We keep seeking. Many of us go about in this world, not knowing, not asking. They are simply happy with their lot. They do not question anything. Maybe thats the best attitude to take, maybe not. I don't know. All I know is that I keep asking questions about myself, to myself. Those are never resolved.

For others, I am Gautami Tripathy, a daughter, sister, friend in the broader sense. For kids, I am a favourite teacher/aunt, as the case maybe. I have a happy disposition, at least outwardly. I have a sense of fairness, I love to interact with people. I accept others with their faults and follies. No one is perfect. As I am not, I do not expect others to be. But I am a very hard task master for myself. I wish I was less angry, less, crazy, less mad. These are all within me, visible only when I go off the lid. Otherwise I am learning to have more patience, more tolerance. These changes have been noticed by my mom and my colleagues. With children, I have always been that. Kids do not respond to anger. They respond to love with underlying firmness.

When I set out to write this, I did not know what to write. I still don't know. Maybe it will take a lifetime to be able to know myself. Maybe more...

For now, I am enjoying being with myself, sometimes reading, sometimes just keeping silent, doing nothing, seating in a park bench reflecting inwards. Or watching people. Or birds. or staring at nothing.

Sunday, August 06, 2006

My experiences with my right arm in a cast

Here I would like to share those three weeks when my right hand was in the plaster cast. Chk here for the photo of my cast.

I had slipped in school and dislocated my right elbow. After setting it right, it was set in a plaster cast for three weeks.Though there was no pain inside the cast but there was a constant itch inside which I could not scratch.My arm was plastered from shoulder to half my palm. There was hardly any movement for that hand. It was my right hand. I could not do a thing. I could not write. Eating was a problem. As I have very long hair, I couldn't even comb my hair. I could hardly dress myself. The first few days were horrible. Still I have my mom to help me around. She at 70+ helped me with all those essential chores. I started to eat with my left hand. For a right handed person, it took a while to get used to it.

I could not sleep most nights. As I sleep sideways, it was kind of difficult for me. So I catched up with my reading those nights I couldn't sleep. Good for me! I had a back log of reading!

The normal daily routine we do, became a chore for me. I could take a shower only by sticking out my arm. I had to take very good care so that it did not get wet. In those days, the weather was horrible too. The humidity level was very high too. My arm felt sweaty and hot inside that cast.For the first two weeks, I took it rather well in the circumstances. The last week was not too good. I felt irritated all the time. I didn't feel like eating. I needed the best of diets and here I was almost off food. My mom had to cajole me to eat properly. She made sure I took all the medicines/vitamins/minerals.

Suddenly I realised that walking too couldn't be fast. With a plaster cast, my right side felt heavy. Walking around with a sling did make even strangers ask me what happened and how I was. One good thing about the whole thing was, I learnt to use my left hand. I could type with the fore-finger of my left hand. Best part was I could write with my left hand on the chalk board. As I am a teacher, thats very important. I did take off from school most days but the days I did not I wrote with my left hand. I being a mathematics teacher, chalkboard writing is the most important part of teaching.

How we take our body for granted! We crib, rant about all the silly stuff in our lives. I now know better. With a healthy body and mind, I don't think I will crib again..why me, why me! After the cast was taken off, I felt free. It will take a while for my arm to be fully functional again. But I can write, eat, bath, comb and do all the stuff I have been doing with my right hand. I tire easily but so what? It is still stiff and I am undergoing physiotherapy. My priority is to get my right arm fully functional.

Now I am more patient. I am enjoying the use of my hand. I look at life with a new light. Not that it was any life threatening but it did change my perspective of life for good. How our thinking changes!

A loo limerick

Now we are posting limericks on loo
For that we must thank the glue
She was but stuck
It's her bad luck
Hope she did what she had set out to do!

Referring to this
news item, one of my friends' wrote this.

I followed it up with one of mine!!! LOL!

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Piercing looks

It's good to be able to type with both hands.Posting one of my short verses. Will post longer ones now that my plaster cast is off. Glad to be "armed" as don says!

What do you dwell on

Slitted eyes asinine looks
Who says you are scary

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Finally my plaster cast was taken off

I am so glad. Finally my cast was taken off. Ligaments healed nicely. I will not feel itchy and scratchy any more. I feel so elated that I can use both hands in typing.

Yes, I do need physiotherapy to straighten it out. Still I can use my right hand. I might not be able to lift weights for sometime but so what? Exercise will take care of that.

Only when we are not able to use a body part, we realise its worth. How I had missed my right hand.

All is well that ends well. Thought I should share this with my blogger friends.

I will post my experiences about how I managed with one hand for three weeks after a while!

But for now I feel like dancing!!!!

Tuesday, August 01, 2006


the peeping sun
infinite lines from single point
still the darkness befells