I saw the message in the sky
arrived as soon as I could
weeds embraced her lovingly
ignoring her raucous breathing
her closed eyes were strung together
(I wanted those to open and look at me)
I took a blanket, covered her carefully
although I knew it was a lost cause
it was the 11th Anniversary of 10th day
of I don't recall what (wait while I think)
she obviously had forgotten it too
or I wouldn't have found her in water
I had been anticipating to meet her
those words had already formed in my mind
"do you remember what we promised when we met...?
certainly not your inevitable death "
22 comments:
Full of feelings Gautami..you always throw surprises.. thanks..
I love this one. You have such a way with words, Gautami! Such beautiful poetry :)
Hi Gautami, this was incredible . very nice .
This was so moving and thought provoking. I know it's a poem but I would love to hear much more about this relationship. Good job.
Unsettling. And disturbing.
(the qualities of many a good Centus)
=)
Great job! Love the raucous breathing, and still thinking about her closed eyes being strung together.
Very moving. You words have certainly set me mind alive with wonder and possibilities.
Malisa
Very unusual lines and full of emotion....
Beautiful and sad, you're so good with that twist at the end
I could feel the weight of emotion. love it!
That was so emotional . Mine is where I hope to be in 11 years My divorce is imminent so I need to prepare to not look back
Very moving. I had to read it a number of times. Well written.
Haunting piece, Guatami. Beautifully written and evocative.
I had to read this through again, very moving. And you set the scene beautifully, I can see it in my mind's eye. Very original take on the prompt. Kat
What a sad piece. Very masterfully woven tale.
Very mooving and provocative
wow! incredible writing. left me with an eerie feeling i won't shake for awhile.
You have an exceptional way with words.
Wonderful and mysterious.
This gave me the chills. So poignant and sad. Victoria
Gorgeous. And as someone else said, unsettling. Wonderfully extraordinary.
What an unsettling and lovely use of these prompt words.
I wrote this prompt in honor of Mr. Jenny's and my 11th Anniversary which was on this Saturday! And this was such a wonderful read that it was like an Anniversary gift.
Thank you for linking.
Wow.
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