what do you chisel away?
my nerves are on edge
my heartbeat so fast
the ground splits
you crumple that paper in your palm
drop it into that slit
why did you bruise the earth?
you could have burnt it.
in the glow of the fire
I would have watched your face
that piercing look in your eyes
when your mind crashes to ground
we both burst into the sky
no one wins nor is it a draw
seems like it is what you are good at
it is your life's mission
to demolish everything
be it for a living
or to wreck my working week
"a buried paper can be taken out
I know you will read my love letter again"
23 comments:
The struggles of life are truly challenging, good write.
I love the progression of this poem, Gautami. Well done.
Pamela
Awww... I hope this is all poetic licence and not your reality.
Sometimes people do take great delight in crushing us.
This tells a story very well. One can imagine the facial expressions. The closing lines are so poignant.
I tight well-written poem, interesting and engrossing. Thank you.
http://leapinelephants.blogspot.ca/2012/06/deep-tissue-bruising.html
Inriguing.
There're people who thrive doing nasty things to other people. This is part of life's drama. Great write Gautama!
Hank
beautiful, your words dig into the heart of the reader.
This is nice!:)
I can feel the emotions in this poem~
The dance of intrusion...powerful and painful...
Well Done
I just love this stanza:
"the ground splits
you crumple that paper in your palm
drop it into that slit
why did you bruise the earth?"
Excellent poem!!
A beautiful piece...so moving.
What a crashing sound to the ground ~ I would stay away from him or her ~
Wow! One of the harshest accusations I've ever read... It is your life's mission... Well done!
A beautiful capturing of the pain of conflict....great writing Gautami! :-)
chisel away
why did you bruise the earth
your mind crashes to ground
we both burst into the sky
wreck my working week
Loved the poem, these lines most of all.
Love this one. It sings and it stings.
ugh on those that live only to dismantle you know...not a nice person to have to be around...
your earnest feelings thread in
gold through out your poem/plea.
reminds me of when i allowed someone to chisel away at me.
fine poem.
I like this, especially the ending where you express your confidence that he's just being mean, but will read it again. Hope you don't really know anyone this cruel, but I sure like the write.
This evokes a deep wound, a sadness. Why do people need to hurt one another?
Gautami,
Read 5 poems now. Each one stands out and this one is the best. I hope to see your poems in English course some day.
Take care
This is really beautiful... thank you for sharing!
Steph @ Stepping Out of the Page
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