Saturday, August 28, 2010

rock bands rock out of my brain

I am nothing but air trapped in a vacuum
of my own making

within my brain chaos thump on the walls
creating the most beautiful ache

some rock bands may come out those
maybe I ought to market those

I lay down with the lies I tell myself
that love will help me die

I wrap everything in a scented tissue paper
and hit my head with my fists

if only it was possible to gather the crumbs
into my empty fold. if only...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I must mention here that not all that I write is autobiographical. So I wouldn't like anyone to assume as much. As I said in my blog header, I don't know from where words come, how they form and why I write. I have to. Isn't imagination a wonderful thing? For a poet?

24 comments:

Ramesh Sood said...

Did I find sadness there, Gautami.. well, it's all in the flow.. I am sure you will be out of it.. but I adore the way you write, the word you create so naturally,, marketing a rockband out of thumps in the mind.. a salute to your creativity..

If you wanna have a laugh, visit me, I promise laugh you would..

anthonynorth said...

Such powerful, poignant words.

Diane T said...

I think you should go visit Ramesh! Seriously you could be a rock star with all that rhythm going on in your head. But please don't hit your head with your fists! Wishing you a great weekend!

twitches said...

I don't know why people assume because we write poetry, it's all about us. Half of my poems are stories told to me by other people, or completely made up. Fiction is a part of poetry. That said, nicely done poem, I especially like:

I wrap everything in a scented tissue paperand hit my head with my fists
if only it was possible to gather the crumbsinto my empty fold.

Elizabeth said...

I love what your imagination came up with here. The lines are a feast of images and impressions. I especially love "to gather the crumbs into my empty fold." And I agree, its hard when others assume that the narrator is the poet.

Elizabeth

Systematic Weasel said...

Very imaginative take on the prompt! Before I go, I've got a couple of awards:

http://systematicweasel.wordpress.com/2010/08/28/awards/

-Weasel =)

Pan/Susannah said...

I really liked these lines and the imagery they conjured . . .

"I am nothing but air trapped in a vacuum
of my own making"

"I wrap everything in a scented tissue paper"

"if only it was possible to gather the crumbs into my empty fold"

Nice writing, I enjoyed your take on this prompt. :-)

flaubert said...

Gautami poignant poem!
It moved me.
Nice!
Pamela

Mary said...

Strong imagery in this poem. I feel the beat.

RiikaInfinityy said...

Strong words and the image you portrayed within this poem sort of brutal XD correct me if I am wrong :X
it is wonderfully written as always=D

Harshad mehta said...

Rightly said '... my own making'

Actually that idea of marketing rock bands made me laugh.

Very creative.

vivinfrance said...

Ouch! My ears are buzzing. A very clever poem, and a great interpretation of the prompt.

Jeeves said...

Powerful....Wherever the words come from, they come as powerful words

Marja said...

Great images I love this line
"if only it was possible to gather the crumbs
into my empty fold. if only.."

Leo said...

oh this is lovely, Gautami.. the chaos in mind do sound loud at times.. lovely expression.

Sandra.if said...

misterious and original ending!

K said...

I love the lyricism of this poem and the vibrant images. The line about wrapping in tissue paper...i could see this in my minds eye...what a fragile medium.

ρομπερτ said...

Great, great writing indeed !


daily athens

Wayne Pitchko said...

it rocked Gautami......nice imagery and agree...poignant...thanks for the words

Tammie Lee said...

'creating the most beautiful ache', I think I have felt this. So tangible that no matter the feeling we know we are alive.

Tumblewords: said...

Highly creative! And unless noted otherwise, I always assume everyone's work is fiction... probably, because mine is. :)

one more believer said...

writer's island this week's prompt "if only" does have a sorta downer theme... not that i would think you would be pounding your head with yr fists...

Geraldine said...

There is a lot of emotion in your words! Well done with the prompt, powerful.

www.mypoeticpath.wordpress.com
www.veggiesyarnsandtails.wordpress.com

Patti said...

I really enjoyed this- whether it's autobiographical or not- you are an awesome writer!