Wednesday, October 06, 2010

a subtle hint

that sheen I see
on their skins-
a hint of hard work

those play of muscles
on their forearms-
a hint of hard work

the beat of hammer
on the hot iron-
a hint of hard work

we are beautiful people
we only lust for your love
a hint of sadness

they get up to dance-
with masks, and swelling chants- 
a hint of abandon

"they are the salt of earth, and I couldn't agree more"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three Word Wednesday provided these three words: hint, lust, sheen. Working around those was not easy as I did not wish to go the obvious way. Hope what I did works well.

I have taken a line or two from Ka'Ba by Imamu Amiri Baraka. Those lines are we are beautiful people and dance- with masks, and swelling chants. I have somewhat edited the second line. Do read the full poem clicking on the poet's name. To know more about the poet, check out the following link:

27 comments:

Deborah said...

This felt really strong and proud, I really loved it!

jaerose said...

the repetition really added to the feel of your poem - you could feel the hammer of hard work going up and down..jae

Nanka said...

Nicely flowing and with beautiful lines describing hard labor.

pia said...

I love how you took lines yet made the poem totally your own
Also love how you use "hint"

Angel said...

Lovely piece.

Tumblewords: said...

Nice capture! The repetition works so very well.

Storm Dweller said...

In addition to the imagined eye-candy, you delivered very well on the word-candy. Nicely done as usual.

ThomG said...

the repetition really works for me.

Writer on Board said...

Thanks, Gautami. You are the beautiful people....

Jingle said...

love the flow...

G. Graham said...

I liked the repetition, and the way you used sheen. A very nice poem.

nimaruichi said...

Lusting for love, very nice.

nimaruichi said...

Lusting for love, very nice.

irene said...

Your hinting is lovely.

Derrick said...

The enslaved have a beauty in dignity.

vivinfrance said...

Hint of hard work: more than a hint, I'd say: a rhythmic statement! A very clever poem.

flaubert said...

I love this poem Gautami!
Pamela

Christine said...

This worked beautifully, Gautami! I loved it.

Mary said...

This was wonderful, Gautami

Diane T said...

You ARE one of the beautiful people. I am so PROUD of you for sharing your poem!

Zouxzoux said...

I have a fondness for repetition and use it fairly often. I really like this piece and how it drives home the point in such a lyrical way.

Jeeves said...

Hint of perfection. The poem

Jeeves said...

It shudnt be hint,,,its all perfection!!Lovely one

ms pie said...

i LUV yr response to this week's big tent poetry... it is important to read the author's poem only because it adds more to yr own individual poem... whether we piggyback or stand alone it is a beautiful piece... especially so again yr response to imamu's poem kaba...

senderupwords said...

This is a wonderful write. Love and Light, Sender

quid said...

Lovely. I could picture the scene from your words.

quid

Susan Helene Gottfried said...

I love how similar our thoughts went with this prompt!