This time the prompt is to write about Message In a Bottle.
blue tinted veined tapered bottle
floating aimlessly up and down
finds direction when waves crash
i watch it with anticipation willing
it to reach towards me. swirling
it plays hide and seek like a child.
tired it comes and rests on sand-
turning over, sated with journey
origination of which is unknown.
i let it be, but only for a short while;
bending down on my knees, picking
it up with care, i examine squinting
to look into its interior, visibility of
which is almost zero. waxed cork
comes off easily enough. rolling
to ground, parchment falls at my feet.
eagerly i pick it up, opening it with
care, my eyes scan it taking in little
details. perplexed for a split second
comprehension dawns. blankness of
that missive brings forth with force-
messages with no words stay forever
hanging in air confined to a minute
space spread universally, soundlessly.
no words can replace profoundness
of calm least of all message in a bottle
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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34 comments:
"Messages with no words stay forever", how true. That was lovely. I have been catching up on some of your older posts, your writing is superb...I will be back to read some more. Thanks for sharing.
This is wonderful! I really like the ending.
no words can replace profoundness
how true...
no words can replace profoundness of calm. I absolutely love that.
Very good
A blank message, how wonderful. I love this Gautami.
Seems our minds were working on similar lines.....cool!
really like this idea
thank you
beautiful simply beautiful
you always get to the heart of the matter with such force...this is a wondeful piece.
Absolutely gorgeous poem, Guatami - message with no words stay forever - yes! Well done, you!
I love the way you play with the words and paint pictures with them..
beautiful prose.
peace, kai
indeed beautiful!
I too am reading through your older posts, your words are mesmerising and really drawm me in. I love this post- wonderful.
Thanks Gautami...
you definitely have a great way with words, making ordinary things sound so exciting.
wonderful poem.
Absolutely wonderful!!! A perfect ending to this little tale.
How creative ~ What an intriguing idea, that the page would be blank - "Messages with no words stay forever" makes me think also, that
'messages with no words can say whatever' - whatever you want them to say...:)
Today I can leave a message as most of the time I haven't been able to although I read faithfully! That makes me happy No message or the unwritten message, and the conclusion were wonderful. I was surprised and pleased
a wonderful idea. Like those before me I found your poem truly 'profound'
"messages with no words stay forever" - my favorite line.
How absolutely true. A gesture, a look, a thought of what might have been, all last longer than whatever might be put on paper.
I loved it.
Beautiful - the power of silence can make or break a person.
gautami,
Blank paper...profound message!
Profound poem, very well done.
rel
Very nicely done. Thanks for checking mine out as well I appreciate it.
Sweet tami, my friend, each week I never know what you will weave for us . Just beautiful.. I am in awe.... a blank page speaks volumes to us all....
love-Melanie-bd
Beautiful lines... specially the end.
"Messages with no words stay forever" very thought provoking.
i love how you build suspense until the surprising revelation.
well done!
(i try to say much in a few words because i can't wax eloquent) :)
Great idea! I, too, liked the "messages with no words...." Fine ending!
Great work!! As did most everyone, I found "Messages with no words stay forever" most thought provoking.
The ending is deep. I feel like having messages that can't be put into words sometimes. A nice week for you!
Well done, well done! I'm going back for more!
Enjoyed the free verse style of this poem ... taking us on the journey of finding a bottle traveling the ocean waters! Peace, JP/deb
Your popem creates an island of infinite wisdom- a message that needs no words encompasses all messages. I think this poem is in keeping with the philosophy of other poems of yours that I've read.
The rhythm flows like the waves on the shore, and the narrator moves with the same rhythm, not hurrying toward his find- the bottle.
Amazing poem. The ending was a wonderfully unexpected twist.
Lovely! I love where you went with this. Everything is encompassed in silence or wordless-ness, so everything that needs to be said is brought forth by the blank page. Your poems are always a joy to read! Thank you Gautami.
The words at the start bring clear images, and then when I've finished reading, I find this haunting.
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