Tuesday, January 08, 2008

sans defeat-----Writers Island



I am a symbol of what I would become-
fragments fraying eventually.
one day all I would have is moment,
when I do forget my own essence.
It takes courage to master past, present, and future.
I find myself in a colourless void of hope-
a horizon I would never reach.
I am a mirror, which only sees your image,
reflected against my anatomy,
echoing human intuition.
I do not fit into my own identity.
aimlessly I meander around a life worth living,
I will wake up, put on walking shoes,
take off to become what I will be-
every moment along the way satisfying me.
no longer a inert observer of my world-
breaking out of these cocoons,
patiently constructing doubts into walls,
sans past, sans present, sans future.

remind me to drop you a letter.

36 comments:

Rambler said...

aimlessly I meander around a life worth living,

I like the contradiction, a life worth living in its own forms the biggest aim

UL said...

"I am a mirror, which only sees your image,
reflected against my anatomy,
echoing human intuition." is what got me...

we see more of others in ourselves thus forgetting to look inward and discovering ourselves..beautiful. If you do develop this any further, beautiful as it is, do let me know, write me a letter ;) as I would like to read it. Thanks.

Herb Urban said...

My comments can not add anything to your beautiful words. New meanings reveal themselves to me with each additional reading. Amazing.

tumblewords said...

Amazing. Observer is not such a soft spot. Nice work!! One of my favorites...

Lea said...

Incredible. Every time I read your words, something new is revealed. I love the line... "I am a mirror, which only sees your image, reflected against my anatomy..." and "I will wake up and put on walking shoes..."

I look forward to that letter...

Robin said...

I do not fit into my own identity.

I like the inherent contradiction here.

writerwoman said...

I love this. It is filled with remarkable line after remarkable line.

...eatsbugs said...

"I will wake up, put on walking shoes,/take off to what I will be,"

I like these lines best. They are he volta between the sense of failure and the dreaming forth that I sense in this poem.
Also, I noticed the italicized lines, and that they read together as a sort of poem in a poem. Was that purposed?

Thanks for stopping by!

DG said...

Lovely poem, glad I chanced on it. Reminds me of my dialogs with myself not so very long ago.

watermaid said...

A very thoughtful take on the prompt.

http://watermaid.wordpress.com/2008/01/07/beyond-the-horizon/

keith hillman said...

So many lovely phrases and such a remarkable use of words. Congratulations.

paris parfait said...

Your lovely poem is full of contradictions - and wisdom. Lots to think about...

ratanaong said...

mm...urgh...trying to figure out who/what you are...:) the closest match was when I am in my watchful mood after coming out of meditation. Excellent use of words that trigger various possible meaning! Love the post!

Brian said...

I really like all your recent words of poetry and prose. I feel that you are getting close to a decision. Good luck my friend and thanks.

Pat Paulk said...

Could you send that FedEx?? Loved it!!

Just Jen said...

Just awesome! finding yourself in a world with layers....loved it!

lissa said...

That's beautiful. "I find myself in a colourless void of hope-a horizon I would never reach. " - I really like this line. Again, wonderful use of words.

Preethi said...

wonderful take... beautiful words... simply amazing!!! very good work

Over the Horizon

Penelope Anne said...

"sans past, sans present, sans future."

An open slate left to be written up...inspiring, moving words you have written.

MY first WI entry is at:

http://wannabeawritersomeday.blogspot.com/2008/01/over-horizon-writers-island-edition-1.html

floots said...

like the whole thing
but
for me
that wonderfully ambiguous last line gives it an incredible "punch"
thank you

Beloved Dreamer said...

I am not sure just what you are Tami but I know that you must be beautiful inside and out. Your poetry and prose tell me this.

love-Melanie

Revathi said...

I believe it is HOPE and FAITH as reflected in your lines below that lets us live our life to the fullest, evey moment of it.



I will wake up, put on walking shoes,
take off to become what I will be-
every moment along the way satisfying me.
no longer a inert observer of my world-
breaking out of these cocoons,
patiently constructing doubts into walls,
sans past, sans present, sans future.

Jeques said...

You know, there's a parallelism again in our thoughts in what you have written here with the article I posted yesterday in my blog. Mine is, "Pending Life." We speak semilar thoughts only expressed in different manner. Check it out:

http://jeques.wordpress.com/2008/01/08/pending-life/

I wish you well.

~ Jeques

Susan Helene Gottfried said...

This reminds me of a Linkin Park song.

That's praise, btw. I really dig their lyrics and music.

LittleWing said...

hmmm, reading your poem i felt as if our skin holds us back from what there really is out there for us...thank you for speaking so clearly with beautiful images

sister AE said...

This reads very different today than it did when I read it last night. It tickles something in me, but something that refuses to be named. I'm going to have to come back and read it after work when I have a bit more time!

chicklegirl said...

I, too am a fan of the lines:

I will wake up, put on walking shoes,
take off to become what I will be-
every moment along the way satisfying me.


I like the idea that our doubts and uncertainties are part of a dreaming, unconscious state that we can use to construct our destiny when we awake. I've been pondering on these same themes lately, and I LOVED this!

Pauline said...

the first line is such a great entry into a poem of intention

Within Without said...

Wow, Gautami. These last three or four posts, you seem to really be revealing who you are.

Maybe I haven't been paying attention, or maybe you've opened up your insides a bit, I'm not sure.

What I know is I was struck tonight by you...and those lovely insides.

"It takes courage to master past, present, and future."

It sure does.

I hope you do it. It's all in the trying, anyway. Thanks for opening up.

Pip said...

Remind me to send you a letter. I love that line!

Tammy said...

How do you write so profoundly on the fly? You rock! So many human truths found here. XXOO

rebecca said...

quite beautiful.

Richard said...

"I find myself...a horizon I would never reach." Nice.
"...put on walking shoes/take off to become what I will be-" Also nice.

Good thoughts

Remember this? -

Ah, make the most of what we yet may spend,
Before we too into the dust descend;
Dust into dust, and under dust, to lie,
Sans Wine, sans Song, sans Singer, and sans End.
Rubaiyat XXIII

Clare said...

Hi Gautami! This poem is breathtaking and blew me away. I love the gentle yet incredibly powerful voice in it -- a peaceful warrior reclaiming one's own spirit. Beautiful. Thank you.
:)

polona said...

i read this one several times and always found something remarkable.
love the last line!

mariacristina said...

tami, I saw this poem up at poets who blog- it deserves to be showcased.

When I read it I'm reminded of the idea of pure, clear awareness. THese two lines are what led me to that thought:

one day all I would have is moment,
when I do forget my own essence

This poem needs to be read many times. Each time the meaning will grow.