any path traversed was filled with travellers like her
looking out for wealth, a few for their lost souls
on much thumbed map, folded into itself
bonded by despondency, blank eyes, lined face
sleepily she examines each face
tightly holding on to her umbrella
big black one like the darkest of nights
she wishes for thundering rains to cleanse people of their thoughts
sky breaks into two, lightning splits forth into resounding doom
each face turns above somehow divested of gloom
nature always comes into aid of fellow travellers
slowly she walks away, parasol clutched to her side,
humming a tuneless song with no words
disintegrating into waters of paradise
31 comments:
very well done
I like the image of travellers out looking for their lost souls. Dark, but somehow not overwhelmingly so.
Lovely. The stormy days and the stormy lives are a build up of emotion, waiting for the flash of insight/lightning to open the gates and let the waters of rain or tears wash ur the soul and heavens, making way for more.
gautami,
So true that the rain shows no favorites; it falls on all alike!
Nice piece.
rel
i love this...feel the moment and the mood.
beautiful spirituality!!
Intriguing and simple.
Such a wonderful portrayal of life. Ah but the rain washes away all tears. Best wishes to you, Gautami.
well done....quite lovely
I love a good rainstorm. All the expensive makeup and hair products men and women use to hide their insecurities about who they are get washed away just the same. I love how you use rain as an emotional cleansing. Brilliantly done.
Nicely layered and deep. Rain is a cleanser of many things.
I enjoyed reading your poem. Thank you for reading mine, and for the compliment.
beautiful
Another of your simple yet beautiful pieces.
I guess we all have our storms and lost days. Well done Gautami!!
amazing.. despite the looking for the lost souls et al, its actually quite cheery!! Its really nice how you have written this!!
Your descriptions are right on and your word choices are perfct! I can see them all there. I can see their feelings. Takes talent!
very nice guatami....
I like the darkness of this..the singularity yet the "joining" with others...looking for???? And we are never alone...other souls are with us.
Beautiful phraseology.
Nice imagery. Love this phrase:
"humming a tuneless song with no words".
*nature always comes into aid of fellow travellers
So true.....always the aura of our bountiful nature will disperse gloom
you are as deep as I am shallow.
sensational piece!
cleansing rain and lost souls...beautiful.
Well done as always and I loved
"a few for their lost souls
on much thumbed map, folded into itself
bonded by despondency, blank eyes, lined face."
You inspire me! XXOO
lovely.
Robin sad it best -- dark, but I could sense some light there too. Great.
The big black umbrella becoming a parasol after the lightning is a great image.
As always I enjoyed my visit here.
Namaste
Ah, very nice! I wasn't inspired by this week's prompt, but you definitely were.
Makes so much sense...loved the title - leveller.
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