Wednesday, December 10, 2008

one fourth of a poem

vague movement
of the enemy
registers only when
splintered bodies fly
shattering lives

28 comments:

ThomG said...

So very true. Brief, but powerful.

Whitesnake said...

loved it! so powerful and yet so beautifully put

Winnie the poohi said...

Lovely!

anthonynorth said...

Very true, indeed.

paisley said...

hey,,, sometimes when the splintered bodies start to fly.... there isn't a whole lot more that can be said.......

Deborah Godin said...

You have captured with such quiet tension that terrible split/second when everything changes forever...

venus66 said...

Pregnant with meaning.

Tumblewords: said...

Vivid truth - you exposed this topic in fine fashion...

Devika said...

Good one, Gautami

wishes,
devika

sage said...

the compact nature of the poem makes it more powerful, nicely done

Pretty Me!! said...

loved the name of the post as much as the poem :)

Greyscale Territory said...

That word "splintered" immediately makes me think of tiny pieces of precious glass scattered! Lovely poem!

Daily Panic said...

this is well written just like it is. I agree with thomg, powerful.

Ghost Particle said...

how vivid. and its a reality.

how r u Gautami?

angel said...

It say alot in very few words!

Linda Jacobs said...

This is like watching a television account of a terrorist attack! Very moving!

cyclopseven said...

Many things in life are not anticipated at all. We react upon manifested scenes. Nasty reality compressed well into few lines.

Devika said...

Thinking of this again Gautami, when your mind becomes your enemy and its vague movements fail to register itself…it becomes the most tragic.

My reading, Gautami…solely mine.

Wishes,
devika

Julia Smith said...

Does it need to be completed? I think the shattered element of the poem works so well with implied verses that will never be.

one more believer said...

simply a powerful statement written in a beautiful timeless 1/4 poem...

Marcia said...

So much said (and well) in those few words, Gautami.

bitchyangel said...

nicely done...

watermaid said...

This certainly packs a punch.

M as in Mint said...

Oh my, what an explosion! And coming from such few words, at that! Well done!

AscenderRisesAbove said...

I was reading your header here; how poetry comes to you. Art does the same to me. Sometimes when i am on a roll I will go to sleep and get flashes of images and I have no idea where they come from, that I have never seen them before, but is like watching a changing slide show. Amazing process this.

Princess said...

the words reveal the actual pain itself..
-Aiz.

Eye for India said...

very graphic

Lotus Reads said...

Wow, what power in these few words. Very well expressed.