Thursday, November 13, 2008

illuminated fear susurrates



monster of my expectations
is so loaded that it can pluck
my crisp thoughts from air
illuminated fear susurrates
with a flourish, swishing
around sassily, crunchy smell
of it stops me on my track.
with a resilience born out of
vacuum, I crackle the air with
my words, which zoom about
making no sense to you who is
luminously insensitive to me

"susurrating fear illuminates air
where my expectations sparkle"

22 comments:

Rob Kistner said...

Gautami -

The words have a tactile essence in this bit of magical verse... ;)

Devika Jyothi said...

Hi Gautami!

"illuminated fear" - could be a very surrealistic poetic imagination...& do expectations sparkle when someone is insensitive, howsoever luminous...

sense some contradiction throughout...

the poetry is good, provided its from a very insensible poetic perspective; to me, i should say...

wishes!
devika

Stan Ski said...

Excellent, thoght provking verse!

Anonymous said...

Rob: Thanks! Poetry has to be tactile. I venture out into surrealism once in a while. But you know that.

Writing poetry in itself is magic when no other words are needed to explain. Once one starts to explain it by going overboard, it fails its very purpose. Some people simply don't get that.

BTW, I have missed you, Rob!

anthonynorth said...

Surreal indeed. Full of mystery.

Whitesnake said...

Hmmm, not sure what to make of it.
It's myserious for sure and illuminating..........

claireylove said...

I really like the image of a 'crunchy smell'!

Raven's Wing Poetry said...

It was easy for me to shut my eyes and see this happening. Surreal indeed. I love this.

Nicole

polona said...

the sounds, the images, they all create a unique mood... surreal indeed

Anonymous said...

Lots of unusual sounds in this one. i can tell you had fun with the words.

Linda Jacobs said...

Love all the S sounds in here. They are like a snake or monster hissing.

And great image of words zooming about!

Tumblewords: said...

Alliteration, push and pull, wonderful stuff! Expectations met, again!

Philip Thrift said...

Lots of nice plays
with 's's and 'k's!

Anonymous said...

Love the susurrates and susurrating, this certainly creates expectation for me - I had to look them up in my dictionary and I wasn't dissapointed.

Ana said...

this is surreal.
and great job with the 's' -it adds power to it

J. Andrew Lockhart said...

the descriptions are wonderful!

venuss66 said...

Nice work done. Thank you.

Borut said...

A good one, sparkling...! With all of its undertones, it leaves one almost illuminated!:)

Bill said...

"luminously insensitive" is very good.

cyclopseven said...

Fear and expectations stand side by side. In the absence of one another cease to arise, while in the presence of one another surely arise. But, both exist in worry of the future outcomes. When fear flourishes for sometime, life can become a hell. If it lasts short, then it can be deemed as forewarning to prepare ourselves for the unexpected. Too much of expectations can become luminously disastrous. I like the way you place positive expression before fear…..illuminated fear. It explains the impact of fear beautifully. Good piece.

Deb said...

Hi Gautami,

"Crisp thoughts" caught me straight away! So many great lines, you could use each to develop its own poem; so rich~

Pat Paulk said...

Mine never whispers very softly. Thanks for introducing me to a new word.