Sunday, March 15, 2009

washed by words

one-legged, tilted to one side-
rusted garden bench
now sprouted with weeds
witness of my past deeds

the way I used to sit there
waiting. waiting for you.
the glances, the kisses
we shared, curled to its corner

we talked of our future
you did. I only listened
totally washed by your words
love radiating from me

which could be felt from
a radii of a kilometre.
it went on and on
basking in your words forever

one similar day, same place
same me, but not you. never again.
no words. sound of breath,
one's own, is so hard to listen to.

this present, which in a way
is well into the future of what
not to be, is as colourful
as the drab earth you joined.

twenty odd years, I still can't let you
out of me. whole of me. in the
bigger picture of my dead life
farewell holds no meaning

50 comments:

Robin said...

You've taken pain Gautami and turned it into beauty.

Jay said...

Oh, that was so sad.

Loss does indeed leach colour from our lives and tilt the benches, doesn't it?

anthonynorth said...

Pain often leads to the best poetry.

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sage said...

You paint such a realistic picture with your words, Gautami, but also on so sad. Thanks for sharing.

Jeeves said...

This will remain one of my favourites ones. I read and reread this many times.

TJ said...

A sad journey well written.
Very touching.
TJ

SandyCarlson said...

I feel the pain of this one. The conversation is so intimate and beautiful yet incomplete. Pain, it seems, never says farewell.

Amias said...

"bigger picture of my dead life
farewell holds no meaning"


When one put feelings into words, that wraps around the reader's mind, and makes it real .. well, darn it, that's poetry!

I could feel the pain ...

Brian said...

Do you mind if I sit with you?

Sue said...

Your poem pulls us in to share your sadness. I particularly like the stanza with the phrase:
"this present, which in a way
is well into the future of what
not to be..."
That turn of phrase is very powerful!

Janice Thomson said...

So poignant Guatami, and so very beautifully said...

captainmolecule said...

Did leave me with some heartburn - beautiful work.

Maggie said...

I can so well relate to your sad tale...you told yours in a beautiful way.

Haiku Tuna said...

I can so relate to "...washed by your words, love radiating from me" -- perhaps that is the fate of some of us, in real life we listen and absorb, but in our poetic life, we radiate to others :-) I know I am awashed by your words, time and time again!

Fledgling Poet said...

The pain of lost and unrequited love is very hard to bear...you spoke of it beautifully here.

Quiet Paths said...

Very painful, very real. A very delicate wordsmith on a difficult emotional place. The last verse feels very familiar. Thank you.

Geraldine said...

This is so touching, so sad and so beautifully written. YOu've captured emotions that I can so relate to. Thanks Gautami!

Hugs, G

Tumblewords: said...

Well done - this one tells the tale of who we were, who we are and who we will be. Good work...

Deborah Godin said...

You have found great beauty in the pain of this empty bench!

Beth P. said...

Dear Gautami--
There's a part of me that wants to rescue by saying, is there anyone that's worth that type of agnegation? And then there's another part that says, sometimes.

I've been there. I no longer live there. Both are good.

Thank you, as always, for your gutsy honesty--

WillThink4Wine said...

Such a sad farewell, still these many years later. Beautifully written, Gautami.

Writer on Board said...

Aw. Crushing. Beautiful.

Linda Jacobs said...

This is one of your best!

this present, which in a way
is well into the future of what
not to be,

I love this line!

Sad but wonderful!

Granny Smith said...

This poem, centered on that bench, is heart-breakingly beautiful. An emptiness is so hard to bear.

keiths ramblings said...

Such a sad and touching poem. I hung on every word.

Tammy said...

That kind of love is best expressed in poetry as it follows us in time. Bravo Tami

endurogirl said...

washed in melancholy, heartfelt and some lovely imagery. Thank you for sharing.

floreta said...

it is hard to truly let go.. i think because they will always carry a piece of you.. a part of you was helped shaped by this person.. i could really relate to this especially:

we talked of our future
you did. I only listened
totally washed by your words
love radiating from me
---

i felt that way too. that i was just listening and going along with everything without active decision.

Sij said...

Nice one..the promises before a farewell..a bitter taste of despair and all that future holds seems futile.

Jim said...

Oh girl! That poem is my song! My first love had a boy friend she was waiting for who was in the Air Force. When he came back, that was all, ist vorbei.
..

Pam said...

The poem grabbed me with its first lines. They made me stop and hold my breath while I pictured the bench.

qualcosa di bello said...

i stopped abruptly in my reading with your words 'sound of breath,
one's own, is so hard to listen to' because that phrase cuts to the quick of the pain of loss

zoya gautam said...

.."this present, which in a way
is well into the future of what
not to be"..

..'sound of breath,
one's own, is so hard to listen to'..

..lovely..many thanks..

Patti said...

Beautifully written, but oh, so sad...

Beloved Dreamer said...

Ah Tami, this is one of your best. Life sometimes does not give us a fair play. We find, we know and loose love. Beautifully written.


love, Melanie

Leo said...

ur words are absolutely wonderful.

i liked esp. the last line. farewell holds no meaning...

Barb said...

I see both outer and inner worlds in this poem. Very moving.

DeLi said...

oh! im so drawn........

Tammie Lee said...

so lovely to touch on such a depth with someone
so sad when that someone
is no longer here
you expressed this beautifully

Sandi McBride said...

I'm trying to decide if this is a poem about death or simply a poem about love and being reunited...I'll take the latter rather than the former.
Sandi

david mcmahon said...

It's been a LONG time since I visited - but what a great post this is.

Merisi said...

I came here thank's to David awarding your his "Post of the Day Award" - congratulations!

A touching prose monument to love, exquisitely composed! I hope creating such beautiful pictures of the mind out of your love gives you comfort and peace. Blessings, Merisi

Sandi McBride said...

I loved it the first time I read it, and now I'm back to say CONGRATULATIONS!! on Post of the Day!
Sandi

Jientje said...

I'm moved to tears. Beautiful.

I came here through David's Post of the Day. Much deserved.

Cheffie-Mom said...

Beautifully written. Congratulations on the Post of the Day Award!

Brian Miller said...

emotional piece...i felt your pain. congrats on POTD!

A Super Dilettante said...

Absolutely touching and reflective. I LOVE THIS POEM!! Congratulations.

♥ Boomer ♥ said...

I ♥ your work, your thought process, the way you heal.

Here from David's. So glad I came by.

Ms. Neha Gandhi said...

very moving...very poignant

Tammie Lee said...

tender piece. the depth of two connecting, sometimes lasts forever...

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