Breath
Scattered
Tomorrow
in that early morning mist,
lake appeared calm almost serene
she had arrived there even before dawn broke out
sitting so still....as if carved out of stone-
chilled cold froze her breath to walls of her nose
scent of rose in its first bloom permeated her senses-
her fingers crushed a bud, scattered petals on her shoes.
same old routine each morning,
arriving before sun showed its sparkling face.
twenty five years was too long to wait for someone.
"plunging into water, she bid tomorrow goodbye"
24 comments:
It's interesting how these three words conjure up thoughts of sadness and tragedy.
I liked the image of scattering the petals on her shoes in a routine. Very nice, as always. Good to visit you.
http://collectingmythoughts.blogspot.com/2008/01/3ww-three-word-wednesday-today-january.html
that was really beautiful.. nice job!!!
Oh no!!!!!
:(
Oh what a tragic ending. Very, very sad.
I really liked it. The words did conjure up a tragic ending
I don't know how you do it--I'm so in awe of good poetry
ooh. yowch. I like the image of all warmth gone over 20 years. I also did a crushed rose today.
bid tomorrow goodbye...a final act, for sure. Sad. Well-done.
This was striking, gautami, and beautifully written.
I can smell those roses like at a funeral! Sad but wonderfully written!
burrrr....the beauty of answered love...
Love these images -- and I love "froze her breath to the walls of her nose" -- I could feel it!!!
I felt that cold void in her through your words but the end still caught me off guard. Well done!
XXOO
Sadly beautiful. 25 years is an awful long time to wait on someone. There is great sadness is waiting that long for something. I thought her letting go was almost an uplifting ending.
She can't give up! Spring is 'round the corner!
sometimes the sadness is just as beautiful as the happiness. you posted a wonderfully, tragic work and i admire you for it all the more.
heartbreakingly beautiful
this piece reminded me of someone I know, thankfully though her story had a more happy ending.
enjoyed!
O, how beautiful yet so sad and unfortunately this does happen in life. So very well done!
S
That's beautiful. It is so sensual and sad.
Very nice...sad.
Hello Gautami,
You are really good with words and writing. Always clear and uncomplicated. I like what you wrote.
Thanks for your encouragement.
Serena
Ooo sad one, but beautiful.
Wow, did not expect that ending! I like the phrasing of bidding tomorrow goodbye.
Anyway, thanks for the comment on my first 3WW - can't wait for next week's! :)
Once again you throw in a detail I'm not expecting and an ending that, though unexpected, fit. I, too, love sad poems. I wonder if it is because to be sad we had to have cared. Laughing is much easier.
beautiful!
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