Tuesday, October 06, 2009

get that card for me

that card, invisible though it is
where now do I search for it?

my sanity

who now is a total stranger
swirls in and out

would it stay or come out-

when now?

unsound cavities in my teeth
rattle rapidly like windowpanes

my painful gut

searches for that invisible card
with your numbers on it

I limit myself

& stretch my vocal chords
which renders it fallow

20 comments:

Lorraine said...

oh girl, I get that...let me know if it really exists ;)

anthonynorth said...

An excellent treatment.

Yellow Tulip said...

nicely done:)..keep it up:)

Daily Panic said...

i got the feeling that this was anexiety of loosing a phone number of a love... with all it's complexity.

if so I hope it is found.

Ana said...

sometimes, when old cards with phone numbers and memories and all that fades is for the best, for we can fiond ourselves again...
well done, love the ending...

April Belle said...

Love this line:

"my sanity

who now is a total stranger
swirls in and out"

Oh man! I know what that feels like... This was a great look into the abyss.

Tumblewords: said...

Terrific imagery. I'm particularly drawn to 'sanity - who is now a total stranger...' Enjoyed this!

Janice Thomson said...

"...unsound cavities in my teeth
rattle rapidly like windowpanes..."
I love these lines - such imagery!

Leo said...

brilliant!!

Sweetest in the Gale said...

This was intense, and beautifully written!

pjd said...

Terrific verb choices and multisensory imagery. Almost sane, but not quite.

PS : De-abbreviate as you like ;) said...

nicely done ! :)

Radio Nowhere said...

A nicely done piece...

Amias said...

Running around in circles, yes, I have been in this place --- a very creative write.

Maggie said...

I am not sure I would recognize my sanity if I met it in broad day light...it has been a stranger for so long.:)

I enjoyed this read.

Cricket said...

I had to read this a couple of times - it touched so deeply

Winnie the poohi said...

The last 3 lines .. is just awesome!

AnAestheticBard said...

As if in a dream…...‘Sanity,…..a total stranger’ loved that one,
‘& stretch my vocal chords
which renders it fallow’
fantastic imagery.

b said...

I have been there...I used to say "Please tell me where I can find peace." Now I know the card will be found but not before a soulful search is conducted. Do not be sad...the world can feel your angst.

b

Thank you for your comment.

Irene said...

Oh the elusive contact...i like how cavities rattle.