Friday, October 23, 2009

mean edges

mean edges of the bricks
cut deep into the skin

sounds of that aircraft
tone down the loud silence

sonnets twirl out of my pen
the paper accepts them gratefully

crawling pain turns elusive-
sonnets stand in attention

I cement the various layers
rounding the edges skillfully

tuning to the drones of aircraft
which recedes with much aplomb

"if poetry comes out of all this, why should I complain?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


I participated in Dewey's 24-hour Readathon, which took place on 24-25 October. I posted updates about my reading on my other blog, everything distils into reading. If you wish, you can go and comment there. I will appreciate that very much.

I will get back to your blogs after I recover from the
Dewey's 24-hour Readathon.

My eyes are total goner now!



33 comments:

RBroeker said...

Your way to write is a walk on the borderline: you know the instruments, you know their possibilities, and you know what happens with and in the patient. But if all this turns out in a good poem, there's nothing to complain.

I like your work.

Best wishes
Ralf

Jeeves said...

Lovely work. Poetry just flows

Shraddha@theselfloveproject said...

i loved it ..very edgy..

swapnap said...

I think it was beautiful to " cement the various layers rounding the edges" true, no scope for complain if it all inspires.

Lorraine said...

You have quite a talent dear Gautami, very word-skilled indeed :)

Sweetest in the Gale said...

I loved how this poem flowed, yet it was gritty and rough with the visuals of cement and brick.

b said...

Yes indeed, why complain. A poem is better than most things. :)

b

http://torristravels.blogspot.com/2009/10/pollyann-synonym-disambiguation.html

Tumblewords: said...

mean edges, cement, drones of aircraft, loud silence. Interesting how you've taken these hard nouns and turned them to artistic lines. Nice!

songofsea said...

Surely there's no need to complain with such fine poetry....
So well written gautami.

The Dark Lord said...

Very powerful work, with a smooth flow to it, augmented by vivid imagery!

Greyscale Territory said...

Love the oxymoron of "loud silence"! A very artistic flight of fancy!

anthonynorth said...

Love the idea of building a poem, and the last line is so true.

Amias said...

This was a nice ride!

Amity Me said...

i am amazed reading works of Poets like you...:)

me, i simply write, i just scribble my simple thoughts and ideas in a simple way, and writing like the way you do is such an elusive dream for me...:)

linda may said...

I wish sonnets swirled out of my pen like yours do, or my keyboard.

Loch Rob said...

Edgey, powerful. Several differing thoughts intertwined. Is there some pain and heartache here? I enjoyed a lot.

SandyCarlson said...

How you weave all of life into story, creating meaning. Well done.

Leo said...

vivid & powerful! good one GT!

Linda Jacobs said...

I like the idea of brickwork and poetry writing!

To me, the best poetry arises right from our surroundings...like this one did!

PS : De-abbreviate as you like ;) said...

No one will compalin till you keep churnign out such lines :)

quin browne said...

i've missed reading you... i came back to find the same lovely work..

gs batty said...

interesting and provoking

Shraddha@theselfloveproject said...

very interesting and lovely poem!

Maggie said...

That which was elusive you brought to the front in a smooth and creative way.

lissa said...

I love the line - "sonnets twirl out of my pen" - it's so powerful, poetic and something I would like, wouldn't it be great if words just come out with a touch of pen to paper?

Cassiopeia Rises said...

This is good Tami. the words and images flow like a stream.


love, Melanie

Dee Martin said...

Congrats on surviving the read-a-thon. This was wonderful - shame is indeed like the rough edges of a brick and ecen when others cannot hear it it sounds as loud as an airplane when it speaks in our own ears, but you take it all and turn it into art with your words.

JP/deb said...

we are what we focus on ...

excellent poem.

peace,
JP/deb

Yellow Tulip said...

lovely work :)..no complains

Jukota said...

rounding the edges, breaking open the silence, always the most elusive for me! Nice job!

Jim said...

Hi GT, you can complain. We always can complain. Your poem is a nice complaint showing the world how nasty it really is.
..

Tammie Lee said...

I love the last line,
perhaps with most situations
if something is to be gained, learned, shared, why complain.
Nice.
Spirithelpers

Americanising Desi said...

oooohhh the power and vivacity :D

puts me on my feet!

Shame on me