Sunday, February 20, 2011

a spinning tale, which makes no sense

I draw a line on the sand
and see a streak of light following it
an eerie light, that is so creepy
a premonition of something
I can't see the top,
the bottom is fathomless
yet I spin it
weaving a tale out of it
yes, I'd catch a grenade for you,
but I will not keep it.
I will throw it right back at you.

"after all , destruction is what you are best at"

28 comments:

Nonna Beach said...

Destruction and revenge...hollow, souless pursuits...very good use of the prompt !!!

Ramesh Sood said...

This is indeed evloved poetry ..I enjoy reading you..always..

Tammie said...

I love that it does not make sense. still there are times when there is green sparkles in the sand that one can see when they drag a stick in the sand... memories.

Ames said...

Very profound!~Ames

June Freaking Cleaver said...

I think arguments are verbal grenades...

Great poem!

Sue said...

Good job on this poem.

=)

Harshad mehta said...

Do spin it, do weave a tale out of it.... can it not be loving tale?

I think it can be.

Greyscale Territory said...

In some ways this makes no sense, but in others, it has a gut wrenching likeness to many war stories that feature death and destruction...also...senseless!

anthonynorth said...

This one's very deep.

Kodjo Deynoo. said...

Not sure, you sort of turn my thinking on it's head at the end, but I can see the emotion and passion vividly in this

sandra said...

imagination flows so high...to the top!

Anna said...

Good poem with subtle shifts of meaning, written from a prompt that I really don't like at all.
Well done!
Best wishes,
Anna
Anna's SC week 42 Maisy-Jane

cj Schlottman said...

Interpersonal conflict is so ugly! I agree with June Freaking Cleaver. "I think arguments are verbal grenades.."

Well done!

Namaste..........cj

Kat said...

Very good use of the prompt, which was a difficult one. I'm impressed with your ability to use it in such a deep poem. Kat

Judie said...

Great poem, and great use of the prompt

teric said...

A spinning tale is right; spinning good and bad.

Gems said...

Dark...the beginning confuses and leads to questions but makes perfect sense one the poem is fully read...and goosebumps appear!
Gems x

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

I like it. Just reading it gives me a catharsis. Nicely done.
xoRobyn

Tumblewords: said...

Intriguing! Love the back and forth, the come and go of this poem's energy. Great job!

Rekha said...

wow...this is immensely beautiful...your poetry is so vivid and rich....I feel embarrassed to call mine poems... :)

DeLi said...

a witty spin up!

Lisa at Greenbow said...

This could be anger ebbing and flowing. I hope it tops out.

Karen S. said...

oh yes you have to love a strong and destructable person! very nicely done!

SandyCarlson said...

This resonates with me. That damned grenade!

ms pie said...

ohhh the sting.... oozing wound...... it is good to walk away and come back another day..... love the confrontation though it feels so good!!!

Jim said...

Spinning your tales and never seeing the top. That would be an exercise in futility. Please look upward. :)
I like it, GT!
..

Patrick said...

Well rendered. The voice of this poem is the voice of someone I need.

Jenny said...

Incredible.

Where were you when I was leaving my first husband. I would totally have used some of these lines.

Love this dark and haunting imagery.

Love the truth of these words.

Thanks for a wonderful use of this difficult prompt.