Saturday, April 07, 2007

Papa's little girl----In the news...Sunday Scribblings

Writing this for Sunday Scribblings for their prompt, In the news... This is self explanatory. This is the kind of news which scares me to bits. As I work for abused children and have to deal with all sort of eventualities, there is a grain of truth in here. Writing this from the perspective of a little girl. Hence the broken sentences.

*This is not a poem.

Papa's little girl

Here I am with my momma and papa.
I am their sweet child.
I feel momma does not love me.
She is always so busy to hold me in her arms.
She comes home so late.
By that time I am almost asleep.
I do feel her lips on my forehead sometimes.
Telling me how much she loves me.

But papa, you do.
You always do.
Oh papa, you make me sit on your lap,
kissing me and playing with me.

Those loving touches by you, papa,
thrills me to bits.

I love it when you came home early
from work to hold me
It feels so right.

When you told me it was our little secret.
That I shouldn’t mention it to any one,
I was very pleased.

I did not want to share this with any one.
Not even momma.

How I hate momma sometimes!
On holidays, she takes up all your time.
You too ignore me then.

The other day momma got home early.
She saw me with you.
Why was she so angry?
Why were you so quiet?
Saying nothing?
You kept away from me too.

When I told momma, I liked you touching me,
She said it was wrong.
How can it be wrong?
Why is momma taking me away from you?
Can’t you stop her?

Oh papa, don’t ever let me go.
Hold me in your arms.
We will share our secret yet again….and again.
Shall I undress now?
Why don’t you say something?
I love you, papa.

Papa, why is the police here and asking for you?
..........................................................

For more on the topic, click In the News...

45 comments:

Buffalo said...

Incredibly powerful!

Anonymous said...

She doesn't know yet. So sad, I'm glad you gave her a voice.

Rose

xo

Anonymous said...

what a sad little poem and post. The news that is most often kept out of the news.

Bob the Frog said...

very powerful post and so important to illuminate all aspects of the secrets of incest. the secrets are what keep it hidden and allow it to continue. such a bittersweet depiction of the girls innocence.

Anonymous said...

Gautami,

Powerful and revealing. Thank you.

gautami tripathy said...

buffalo: yes. No other way to deal with this.

rose: do the little girls know? We teach them about good touch and bad touch from strangers. But fathers? Do we ever?

ascenderrisesabove: Well, it is not a poem. Just broken sentences.

I for one know, some mothers don't even want it reported to he police let alone press.

rubyslippers: We always try to hide and avoid the ugly realities of life. I am trying to give them a say. Sad to say, I do not succeed majority of the times.

brian: thanks. It has to be this way.

polona said...

so powerful and poignant!
yes, the abused children need a voice!

david santos said...

Hello, Gautami!
Thanks for you work and have a good weekend.

Borut said...

I've been thinking of touching this topic, but can't do it somehow!?:( Thank you for doing it! Done in a powerfully innocent way!

rel said...

Gautami,
This, I'm afraid is real news. I'd be afraid of the way today's media would handle it. They're too much into entertaining. The last thing they want to do is offend people with reality.
rel

bonggamom said...

How courageous of you to write about such a taboo subject in such a way! It's so sad that things like this happen, but they do.

Suzan Abrams, email: suzanabrams@live.co.uk said...

How astute Gautami, to write about the deep confusion of the child. It is disturbing but rightly so and in an effective way. :-)

P.S. : Gautami, yesterday you left a comment on my url which is My Wordpress Blog.

However, I can't seem to sign in here on 'Other' so I'm leaving these remarks on my Blogger/Google account, which is another blog. Just thought I'd explain. :-)

Romeo Morningwood said...

This is the most egregious of trespasses, the worst violation of a parent's duty to protect their children to the point of offering their own life in exchange for safety of their children.
This selfish act is beyond comprehension for most of us and I am genuinely sickened by how great this problem really is.
I appreciated your angle and examination of how innocence and naivety are such a dangerous combination in the prescence of a cowardly predator.
These days we can't allow our children to expect other Adults that they encounter in public to be forthright and safe..which is very sad but we probably never should have.

In my day we were expected to be polite, submissive, targets but now children are trained to avoid strangers at all costs, and if neccessary, to fight for their lives, all because the legal system refuses to chemically castrate or permanently impound a few sexual predators.

Why enablers turn a blind eye to the actions of their spouses is complicated but the answer is obvious. I wish that I could say more...soon.

Tiel Aisha Ansari said...

Hello,

I'm hosting the Ringing of the Bards poetry carnival, April 15th. If you'd like to be included, leave a permalink to a poem here:

Carnival post

And don't forget to come back and see the carnival!

Anonymous said...

incredible post.

gautami tripathy said...

donn/h.e.: I wrote it because I wanted to highlight the issue. It is not as uncommon as we think. It is not even isolated to a particular strata either. A child trusts it parents. They are what it has known since its birth. So for a child, parents can never do wrong. The same parents abuse the trust. It goes for both girls and boys though girls are worst affected here.

I have faced too many instances where the spouse does not report it. For obvious reasons..

I do try to do as much as I can. Sometimes that is not enough. How does one comfort or console a child molested by its own father, brothers or uncles? Can it get any worse?

Thanks polona, bongga mom, david, borut, rel, susan, michelle for your understanding.

tiel: thanks. I will chk it out.

J. Andrew Lockhart said...

disturbing...

magiceye said...

a very poignant tale in verse...

Steve Isham said...

Your poem is subtle/powerful. It puts me in mind of a 9 year old named Aisha and a 7th century prophet, but of course that was a marriage, not incest.

paris parfait said...

Such a powerful piece - and sadly, all too common. Heartbreaking.

anna said...

I'll never understand how someone could do this.

The perspective you showed is so very powerful. Thank you for writing this and sharing it.

Patois42 said...

I agree: very disturbing. It's this kind of "news" that keeps me from the news.

dsnake1 said...

a powerful and courageous write, gautami.

Pat Paulk said...

An evil all too prevalent.

megan said...

hard to read this one. left me thinking of the trust of a child and how that changes over time.

homeinkabul said...

Very lyrical and there are so many layers to this and so, so sad.

lissa said...

It's so sad to read this.

Enemy of the Republic said...

I understand your point. But this is a poem!

Anonymous said...

Gautami — Such a powerful post. I feel sad and sick reading it, but I'm very glad you wrote about it: Because you work with these kinds of abuse victims, you have a special insight into their viewpoints, and they often don't have a voice that's heard.

Thank you for bringing her voice to where it can be heard.

sage said...

Gautami, the way you gave her a voice is moving and distrubing, showing how evil distorts the truth, causing confusion in the girl--the victim. Thank you, you should send this to Children's Defense Fund or such a group that might be able to use it to demostrate the dangers of incest.

Bill said...

It is a poem, though, gautami, and a powerful and compassionate one.

Jone said...

Wwo, so sad and powerful. I know there are some children in my school that have been victims. I am amazed that some have such resiliency.

Anonymous said...

Very sad, but do you really meet girls who want to be touched that way? Is this the way it really happens?

gP said...

oh well...so much crap in the world, whats another '
more'. Maybe its really Kaliyuga...maybe I should start believing.

monideepa sahu said...

Tragic, powerful, touching. Well done, Gautami. The ending seems a bit pat, though. The fact is, Indian mothers are often too scared of social stigma to actually call the police. She would prefer to let her child remain the hapless victim. Would an Indian father really accept censure in silence, or would he aggressively put down all opposition to his misdeeds?

Thanks for opening our eyes and nudging us to think deeper

gautami tripathy said...

andrew: yes.

magiceye: err, I did not intend it as a verse.

ish: I think I know that tale.

tara/paris: To common which does get highlighted.

anna: believe me it happens.

patois: but this is what we need to hear so that we fight against it. Not easy, I know.

dsnake1: it is very painful too.

pat: yes, it is common.

jennifer: I have learned to deal with my mightmares. Someone has to be presnt there for those children too. I just liste to them. Sometimes holding them.

megan: It was not easy for me to write it either.Whom does a child trust, if not her parents?

homeinkabul: sad, yes...

gautami tripathy said...

lissa: I agree, sad and it hits hard too.

eotr: Thanks. I knew you would. I never intended it as a poem, though.

kg: These are happeningall around the world. We just chose to ignore them. We are desensitized at times.

sage: I tghink I will do as you suggest. You are the second person who suggested that. I will consider sending it for wider readership. And using it as they deem for getting it across to avoid incest of this kind.

bill: thanks. Welcome after so long.

jone: kids adapt and they even learn to look after themselves.

anne: you missed the point. I speak for very young girls who do not know better( 4-8 years olds). Yes, it happens.

ghost: you better. The stuff I see are not for the weak-hearted.

monideepa: welcome to my blog. It happens either way. 10 years back mothers did keep quiet. Not any more. They come out. Not in many numbers but it is happening.

Anonymous said...

I think I got the point that the little girl in your story has been tricked to think what her father does is acceptable. My point is, I think we all have an instinct that tells us certain things are not acceptable, even when we are very small. I have never known someone who was molested and felt it was acceptable. I suppose it may be possible, but it must be extremely rare, even at a very young age. Aren't you afraid that a molester will read this and use it to rationalize that little girls really do want this; that the adults who disapprove are wrong?

gautami tripathy said...

anne: I agree with you to a certain extent. We all have that instinct. That is not my point. Right from very childhood we are conditioned not to talk to strangers and not to let them touch us. But do we ever tell a child
such a thing concerning their fathers or brothers or uncles? Do not think it is not common or it only is concentrayed to a certain strata. It is not. We just brush it under the carpet. Mothers too do that as in a society like India's, they are afraid of losing their sole bread winners.

I do not think I said that little girls want this. That is your interpretation.

There are two sides of everything. We can argue it out either way. Does that mean I do not speak out against it or highlight it?

Anonymous said...

gautami, this was a thought-provoking and courageous take on the prompt, and a powerful, disturbing (in a necessary way) poem. you present all of the complexity of the abusive situation in the simple language of one who is so little that she is as yet unaware of the abnormality of that situation.

Anonymous said...

I'm glad you speak out against it. That's what counts.

Madelyne said...

My heart breaks for the children out there that experience such abuse

gautami tripathy said...

unfolding rose/anne/madelyne: Sometimes we do need hard facts. Only today there was a report that 53% of surveyed children reported abuse of some kind or the other in India. Very disturbing.

Read the report here at Abuse of Indian children 'common. Iis it any wonder that I talk about it?

Kindness said...

absolutely heart-wrenching.

gautami tripathy said...

Yes, Kindness, it is.