in the bin of tangled up holiday,
lights switch off all by themselves.
my fingers cut into my palm
but I search for my platinum ring.
in the darkness
when a soft breath moves against me;
I push it to the plateau
of shaking rattle of my body.
I fill the leaks,
while you free me with your tenseness.
"when my solitaire falls to ground, my plateau becomes a mountain"
31 comments:
What a very creative and unique take on the prompt! Well done!
Wonderful. Sensual. Thought provoking.
Kudos!
What Teresa said.... :-)
Beautiful piece. Had to read it a couple of times to let it all sink in.
oh wow - this was full of sensual beauty - nice!
Your words are always so moving. This was such a beautiful take on the prompt, very unexpected and lovely. Kat
A lot of punch in just a few words.
Evocative.
=)
OH, what an imagination and the words you always weave.. very unique..Thanks..
And thanks also for through your page I could visit Bill's haiku-usa.. oh, my ever increasing passion for haikus.
I have to agree this was very sensual .
Wow. That was great! How you managed to fit the prompt into such a layered poem is amazing.
I so enjoy your work, Gautami. You draw the reader in to the experience through your images.
This was beautiful. Such strong feelings. Good job.
this is quite intense....
Freedom indeed.
Uniquely creative and intense!!
Intensely freeing. What we do for each other! A beautiful search for and discovery of perfection in an imperfect place.
Your words were subtle, yet the sensuality behind them was very powerful. Wonderful poem!
...you free me with your tenseness...
:)
Creative, sensual piece... rising to the plateau. Well done
Oooh the things that happen when the lights go out! Very sensual!~Ames
made me feel reflective...and a bit sad...
moving
This is deep and beautifully written.
xoRobyn
A unique 'word-picture' - impressed !
Please have a good start into the new week.
daily athens
inventive writing..
well done.
interesting paradox at the end
Excellent piece!
This poem is visual and sensual, and so very well done. You are a wonderful poet.
Namaste.........cj
Ooooh! A lusty Christmas! Woo hoo! I enjoyed your beautiful words.
I just posted my story today. Please stop by and read.
Malisa
Wow, a totally different take on the prompt...intense and strong... ;)
Nicely done! A very unique and creative take on the prompt.
Wow. Where did this come from? I am always fascinated by the direction you take these prompts. Your writing always makes me strive harder to find creative directions in my own. Thank you for that. Thank you for linking.
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