Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Questions are like whirlwinds with no outlet


At last, the impossible happened. I did not read for the whole week. A book, that is. I read newspapers, text books, exam papers and anything that is to do with teaching. There are few books which are in various stages of reading. Somehow I have lost that zeal to read. For a person, who stays up late to read, I have been sleeping early. That is around, 10 pm.

In a way, I did nothing. I watched TV, blogged-updated my blogroll and kind of lazed around. I did not even venture out much unless it was for work and/or for essential errands. I wrote for three days and rest of the week, it simply stopped. No words, nothing.

Maybe the winters is getting to me. Delhi never has winters for more than a month. This year February has not been kind. Too cold. Despite the fact that we don't have snow here. It's the wind that gets to the bones. The minimum temperature is around 5-9 degree celsius. It should have been 16-18 degree celsius.

I suppose my mind needs to relax. I have been thinking too many things lately. Maybe giving in to it is the best option. Questions are like whirlwinds with no outlet. I too am fallible, although I try to pretend otherwise. Pain gets dulled, does it ever go away? It can't be healed which has scrapped raw. At times like this, I miss my dad.

I will go, play scrabble online to unwind. Or crossword puzzles are good options too. Or gossip with a girlfriend. Anything to tax the brains.. In no time I would be thinking, I imagined it all.

What? I AM GOING TO BE OK? I know that, folks! Don't slight me by saying it!

28 comments:

Pat Paulk said...

Not a Winter person either. Though I live in the south USA, we do have some cold here from Dec. thru the end of Feb., or mid March. Got hooked on playing scrabble from a friend almost a year ago. Definitely taxes my pea sized brain. Stay warm!

dsnake1 said...

take it easy. :)

i am trying to kickstart this old engine after the holidays. :)

vEENs said...

i think you should relax and take time for yourself :)

it will be ok :)

Truefaith1963 said...

Sounds like you did quite alot to me!!
Its been cold here too but hasn't rained for 5 whole days!!! Must be some sort of record.

Susan Helene Gottfried said...

Sounds like you are recharging. We all need to do this from time to time; don't sweat it.

In fact, enjoy it!

Square1 said...

Lovely rant, Gautami, and great use of the prompt.

deathsweep said...

Amazing what a little recharging can do!

pia said...

Oh do I understand the need to recharge

Sometimes I have to go off blogging to get the energy back to read books--something about being on the computer, blogging and commenting makes me want to read everything but books

Have been giving into the urge to read books more and hang in bed at night watching horrible TV--my bedroom is a computer free zone. Purposely don't have a router so I can't give into the urge to take my laptop to bed--not the same as snuggling up with a book

TC said...

I think that even our most favorite activity takes a back burner sometimes. I did that last year. I used to read a book every couple of days: then I went months without reading one. I'm slowly getting back into it again.

And I agree: this winter is rough :-/

Sherry said...

Nice way to get the words in! I hear your rant, I really do. This winter is rough -- it's terrible everywhere, the cold gets into the bones as you said and it's like everything about us becomes frozen. Sometimes just "being" is a good thing. And I like the "whirlwind" thinking -- that's exactly what it's like. *sigh* -- I find myself doing that a LOT this month!

J.C. Montgomery said...

I love winters. I would have to, living in the Eastern Sierras. But even this love I have has been no match for the ennui I've suffered from lately. I have written a bit yes, but the words I found came reluctantly. Reading has been non-existent; the stack on my nightstand chiding me each time I reach across them to put out the light.

It was a comfort to read your words; ones I was having a hard time finding on my own - words to express what I have been feeling. I can't tell you the relief it has been knowing that I am not alone.

Thank you. Wonderful as always Gautami. Truly.

Christine said...

It sounds like you created a retreat for yourself. I've been feeling the same way, sleeping more, reading less, less energy. I agree with some of the others-you still were amazingly busy for someone who is in a bit of a slump. I like what you wrote here.

Norma said...

I liked the way you got your frustrations out in an orderly fashion, yet slipped in the challenge. Winter for a month sounds wonderful to one living in central Ohio where we have at least 4 sometimes 5.

myrtle beached whale said...

As always, a clever take on the prompt. I hate winter too. That is why I moved south, like a goose.

tumblewords said...

Sounds like fun to me - but what do I know? I haven't been out for 6 weeks because my car can't get out of the driveway due to snow, ice and such. I tried once to do a blogroll but it defeated me. Reading. Page at a time. Glad you ranted - I feel better! Grin.

Melody said...

Have a good break, Gautami! I know what you mean about moments like this... everyone needs a recharge at some times. Enjoy it. :)

paisley said...

i think we all go thru it.. sometimes the mind is preoccupied,, and some times just taking a breather... never fear,, we will be here anxiously awaiting the next words from you plentiful muse.......

Linda Jacobs said...

Yeah, it's got to be winter. I vented, too!

UL said...

I wish I had the time to do everything I wanted to do too, today I was really late with my post, wondered if I should and then did it! Just couldnt resist, but you seem to be doing great. look forward to more from your end, I am gonna just catch up on ones I missed

WriterKat said...

Nice job with the words. Everyone needs to take breaks at times. Good you are not fighting it. Roll with it while it lasts.

Lord Tennisanyone said...

Gadzooks!
Is that why you are so cranky?
You call that Winter? Try five solid months below zero with 7 meagerly hours of visible, bloody, sunlight...
on second thought, don't!

It goes without saying that keeping up on current affairs is very important but there is a slight catch..
the 'Media' is owned by 6 Conglomerates..

http://www.freepress.net/content/ownership

Heather Kathleen said...

i love winter, but i am beginning to tire of it myself...i find myself longing for a little humidity, an open window at night, to see the iris pushing up from the ground...*sigh*

lots of tea, music, books, knitting and a couple of good movies thrown in here and there...show yourself some love :)

Christy said...

Winter does have a way of dragging one down. I think we all go through those questioning periods of life.

Enjoyed the write!

lissa said...

This almost describe what I do these days. There seem to be no inspiration for much lately but writing prompts helps a little.

But as it is sort of a way for us to take a breather or two.

thanks for adding the tag clouds.

sage said...

Gautami not reading for a week? wow, the world may end! Stay warm--but remember at least you don't have minus symbols in front of your temperature!

polona said...

everybody needs some time to relax.
i'm definitely not a winter person either but have to put up with it for months...

extemporaneous said...

I don't mind winter for awhile, then it's just too much! I hate wearing warm clothes and shoes and a coat!

:)

Good use of the prompt...hang in there!

Heather

LittleWing said...

sounds like a meltdown to me... love it!!!