Thursday, February 21, 2008

submerge



This one is from my archives. I played around a bit, changing a word or two.

in the stillness of night
if you persist
in being that close to me-

I will have to find a way
to plunge myself
into your luminous soul.



27 comments:

Square1 said...

Oh my gosh, Gautami! So simple, and yet so deep and powerful too. I'm in awe.

trinitystar said...

I like it ... full of depth :o)

Kai C. said...

deep

Susan Helene Gottfried said...

WOW.

Margie said...

So very deep!
Wonderful poem!

It was a lovely surprise having you visit me today!
Thanks, Gautami for the kind comment!

Margie

paisley said...

for some reason it makes me feel like being in love with a ghost or an angel... very beautiful...

Don Iannone said...

I like this! Thank you for these words, Gautami.

gingatao said...

Very clever thought turn around in the middle, from cautious to actively engaged which is reflected in the structure of the poem. There is something enticing and smilingly tricky and sexy in it.

hedwyg said...

Hoo boy - that is hot and sweet and deep. Gorgeous poem, Gautami!

Brian said...

Fair warning Gautami. Very direct.

lissa said...

I really like the last line - I will have to find a way to plunge myself into your luminous soul. Like a love poem.

anthonynorth said...

Love burrows deep in this. Excellent.

Homo Escapeons said...

Thank You for the head's up...
Forewarned is Forearmed.

keith hillman said...

That is so good. But then your work always is

Crafty Green Poet said...

short and to the point, excellent

tumblewords said...

Wow! That's clever and very good!

Linda Jacobs said...

I like the way both second lines have the same number of syllables. Very haiku-like with it's simplicity!

SweetTalkingGuy said...

Wow! luminous soul!
How cool's that?

Jo said...

yes luminous soul is lovely, this is very good, Gautami

noahthegreat said...

It sounds very devious.

Plunge into my soul, if you can find it.

I can't believe I still haven't added you to my blogroll. Damn it Gautami, I will now.

Mike Mc said...

I like the ambiguity in the first stanza, it leaves plenty of room to think about. Good job.

Scott said...

i really enjoy reading your stuff..
always a twist in them..
thanks for sharing this one..

kryan8907 said...

very nice, very powerful for such brevity.

my backyard said...

Very powerful. I agree with the others that it packs quite a punch for a short poem.

Leonard Blumfeld said...

Wonderful. Treads with poise on a sensitive line between feeling and some irony.

Stan Ski said...

The essence of that feeling we often find so difficult to express.
Some of us are less sincere and find it easy to deceive with flattery.
Love the sentiment; not sure how it would sound coming from me.

polona said...

love this.