Monday, May 05, 2008

clawing crawlies----Read Write Poem/Monday Poetry Train



And come ride the Poetry Train


blighted lights blinked bright

slighting my intelligence.
cooped in the room for so long
eyes to the dashboard
i was trying to decipher signals
never seen before
unknown to earthlinks
large torsoed,
small headed creatures
of outer spaces,
visible through glasses
of the windows in that strange disc
some might call an UFO
those crawly legs, cringed me
clawing at my dry throat
more than elation,
I felt abhorance
no way I was interested
to meet aliens
I prayed for hallucinations

"sometimes spiders have that kind of effect on me"

23 comments:

cyclopseven said...

Arachnophobia? Not all can stand to face it, especially when it raises the phobic fear.

Linda Jacobs said...

Reading this gave me the creepy crawlies!

I like the sounds at the beginning! All the rhyme and assonance!

Brian said...

But if you couldn't see them, then would you be interested in meeting aliens. ;)

paisley said...

much like you i have no desire to encounter aliens... ghosts??? now that i wouldn't mind,, but aliens??? no....

very nice write....

Missy said...

Wow! Very interesting images you've created.

anthonynorth said...

Nicely done! You've got me singing David Bowie songs now from the 70s, with his backing band, The Spiders From Mars.

Linda - Nickers and Ink said...

Yikes! Can't stand 'em either!

But I love how you said it. ;-)

Blessings,
Linda

A SURPRISE ATTACK – A TALE IN RHYME OF A SPIDER BIG-TIME

Cassandra said...

I can certainly do without aliens or spiders...or aliens that look like spiders :P Nice work with the images you created here!

polkadotwitch said...

i'm ready to be abducted by aliens at any moment. seriously.

but imagining them like spiders, that creeped me out a bit. i DON'T like spiders.

you do a great job of getting great-sounding words and sensation in this.

Crafty Green Poet said...

sometimes spiders do seem like aliens!

Julia Smith said...

'small headed creatures
of outer spaces'

This made me think of 1950's sci-fi posters.

Susan Helene Gottfried said...

Okay, my skin's crawling. Blech.

christine said...

Well, spiders sound better than what I thought the narrator was facing. At least a spider can't eat us!

Very creepy.

Just someone said...

you write so well; and extremely versatile... almost gave me a creepy feeling visualizing them:)

jimmmaaa said...

Nice write.....a lot of people are creeped out by spiders :-)

Joy Renee said...

goosebumps creep up my arms crawl up my neck... oh that's just the fan stirring my hair... whew!

thanx for visiting my poem re bike riding

Jill said...

A really good way of descriving a phobia! Spider as aliens! Some of you wouldn't be more scare if they were!

one more believer said...

oh that was very, very good!!!....

chicklegirl said...

The alliteration and rhyme worked well to create more tension and fear... and since I dislike both spiders and aliens... eww, shiver!!!

TOCCO said...

I know what you mean... lots of creepy crawlies bother me. Thank you for visiting my blog and leaving comments! Christina

Kunjubi said...

Bingo! Hallucinogenic! An eerie feeling creeping up. Hope that was the intention! You have succeeded in that.. Congratulation. First time visitor,...Cheers..kunjubi

polona said...

that was so well presented it gave me the creeps :)

Danika / OpenChannel said...

You have some really fun word combinations:

"eyes to the dashboard
i was trying to decipher signals
never seen before
unknown to earthlinks"

"small headed creatures
of outer spaces"

"those crawly legs, cringed me"

I like spiders, actually, but I wasn't thinking about them initially while reading this... at first I thought it was about you being born... (I have mothers on my mind)