each day, every passing day
he longs for the complacent days
to feel the morning entering his bones
turning into lazy afternoons
and cozy evenings
to meet his friends
to walk the sidewalks
to ponder over the lake
when the chug of the train
bring hims to his destination
he walks the asphalt
and sees her at the window
a book in her hand
but a pause in her demeanour
when their eyes meet
she disappears from his vision-
at the door she ruffles his hair
"when he encloses into her, he finds in her, his lucidity"
31 comments:
I always enjoy what you write.. for I find it unique and different..
...to feel the morning entering his bones.. this is really cool - just one line but filled with so much different things that start to develop while reading it
I liked this poem for many reasons. It had great imagery. I could see the woman ruffle his hair.
You write very well.....)
Wysteria
As Claudia said, the line about morning entering his bones is awesome. A strong poem, but that line is the best!
I love what you've written. You take a small event and turn it into a poetic event.
Nice transition from the everyday to the unique moment. there's a nice play of words there between the morning entering him, and his love enclosing him. Always enjoy your work, and this is no exception.
It has a nice flow and gait even with the short verses.
I like it.
This has so many layers yet is simply written - I love the images
A very quiet poem of peace, serenity, and the joy of being husband and wife. These are the little things one misses the most when a partner is gone. Lovely.
Oh wow surprise!
its the pace of this that strikes me...like a drift or a slow walk...good feel to it
Beautiful poem.
Beautiful poem.... Except for the ending!
I love the mystery in this poem. -To feel the morning entering his bones- was so descriptive. I want to warn her that if he is taking so much time wandering the streets he might not be a good catch. LOL
This has the hallmark of an enduring love story.
ah what a beautiful moment you captured...seeing each other and being moved to enfold...smiles.
It captures an episode in the never-ending strive for love and affections. Excellent poem!
Very nice. I see the day-to-day, made easier by the knowledge of such a greeting at its end.
I'm reminded of that old song, "You'd be so nice to come home to..."
Isn't love wonderful! Very nice poem.
super fine.
Like everyone else, the morning line
I like all the parallel bits morning/afternoon, meet/walk/ponder, and especially book in her hand/ pause in her demeanor
A beautiful love poem Gautami.
Pamela
I long for those complacent days myself. Nice One Shot, Gautami!
Such warmth and love I feel from this. Excellent.
Hello Wednesday. Hello Gautami. Hello poetry; always at its finest. You care about your word children and it always shows. Lovely.
A genuinely beautiful and quietly sensual poem written with such fine understatement of such a subtle moment of experience. Wonderful and thank you very much. Good poem!
i feel that giddy-up dreamy romantic reading this
It's flat-out lovely. Beautiful poem.
Absolutely gorgeous. You do a love poem very well. I especially like the line "to feel the morning entering his bones".
-Nicole
This is really well penned. Such an every day event penned beautifully. Love and Light, Sender
oh.. gentle and romantic..
For those glances of love and touches of sweetness, one would travel a 1000 miles indeed!
Beautifully written, Gautami.. so rich in imagery.. and need I even mention the delightful play on words!?!?
Lovely One Shot!
Effective use of line breaks, sparse wording.
Post a Comment