Sunday, June 29, 2008

doorway

I have written a tanka for the first time. Hope I got it right.

I rub my chin
reflectively with the
back of my hand--
each single pore of yours
is doorway to heaven
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
# 9:45 pm(India time): I have been participating in a 24 Hour Read-a-thon. You can check my progress here! Hence I have neglected this blog of mine. I have not been visiting you all. I intend to remedy that ASAP!

28 comments:

SandyCarlson said...

This poem makes me think we are in many ways a a reflection of those around us--and most significantly of those closest to us at heart. Thanks for sharing this lovely work.

Greyscale Territory said...

Your poem highlights how intense the closeness between two people can be.

WillThink4Wine said...

Your poem makes me wish I had someone who felt that way about me.

Whitesnake said...

Certainly interesting.

Rachel said...

Wow, I love your take on the prompt! Right on!!! =)

me ann my camera said...

The rubbing of the chin is often a reflective pose of wondering or decision making... sometimes a hesitancy... to enter the door? Lovely.

the teach said...

gautama, yours and mine seem to express a similar feeling! Great minds... :)

Pam said...

Very reflective, yet passionate.

polona said...

i think you did very well with the tanka

J. Andrew Lockhart said...

yes, this is well done. :)

Jade said...

oh yeah - love.

texasblu said...

Great! I like the reference of your own skin to counter the pores of the other - very intimate in a nonsexual way.

Bill said...

Yep, that's a tanka.

Edward S Gault said...

The narrator truly cares for her lover on every level.
An excellent love poem
-Thank You.

Just Jen said...

24 hours reading...you mean in a row?
24 hrs in a row? woe
i'd be soooo tired!

Raj said...

good to hear from you

teric said...

I think it is wonderful!

tumblewords said...

Nice work, as usual! You do well with all forms...

gardenpath said...

I think it is wondeful, too.

Kathiesbirds said...

Very sensual and sexy! I like how your linked the word "doorway" back to the origibnal post on OSI. Very clever!

literatehousewife said...

I really enjoy the images this poem generates. Very nice and thought provoking

Angelica said...

that's great. pores, doorway to heaven. nice. very thought provoking.

Angelica said...

oh, I love it. simple, yet it says so much.

Beloved Dreamer said...

More and more I read in your work words of love and tenderness. Tami, well done.

love you,Melanie

indicaspecies said...

Wow! Amazing!
I can imagine the magnitude of love.:)

Raven said...

Lovely... I like the physicalness of the expression (not sure how to explain what I mean) - that makes the emotion more intense and real. A read-a-thon sounds like an interesting idea. Hope it was fun.

one more believer said...

an every day initimate moment brought in close for all of us to see... did well g...

Noah the Great said...

Aw, this is great!

I know how that feels. :D