Friday, February 22, 2008

chequered shadows

raging storm stopped
leaving behind remained quietness
slowly lassitude settled in,
bringing with it peace,
seeping out of each pore,
satiated to the brink.

each single breath evened out
eyes fell heavy
lashes casting chequered shadows
on silken smooth cheeks
dewy lips settled
palms open towards the sky

his fingers entwined with hers
his head fell on her disarrayed hair
in aftermath of passion
he pulled her closer
nuzzling her ears
saying sweet nothings.

"next moment
he was snoring away to glory"

35 comments:

Steve said...

a wonderful piece

Anonymous said...

passionate!

Anonymous said...

As long as you were satisfied, let him snore. :)

Rose

xo

Macie said...

I love it. I love the reality of passion here . . . wonderful, beautiful, capped off with snoring.
http://maciesreads.blogspot.com

Liza on Maui said...

Love it! Beautifully written poem, including the part about snoring ;)

I scribbled a poem too for this Week's Sunday Scribbling :)

Susan Helene Gottfried said...

Okay, I'm in the middle of a snow/ice/rain storm so the first line made me conjure up the weather out my window (which you have to lean around books to see out of, at least from where I sit).

When the truth of the scenario was revealed, imagine my surprise!

btw, I agree with Rose: let him snore so long as you're happy.

Anonymous said...

I love the second verse, especially, Gautami, such a contrast to the snoring.

nonizamboni said...

A sweet, funny poem--You really got me!

Sherry said...

Loved this Gautami!! I wasn't expecting that ending -- you described the passion so beautifully..and you described the reality beautifully as well!!

Jo Anne O. said...

This is very good...I had to go back and re read it from the beginning and then it all fell into place! Just lovely!

Granny Smith said...

This is beautiful poem with a neatly funny twist at the end. I enjoyed it immensely.

awareness said...

deep slumber after deep passion? I enjoyed your poem Gautami. :)

UL said...

i love the way you described passion...esp. that bit of his face buried in her hair..so very beautiful...

rebecca said...

perfectly written poem....passion ignited and doused....expected ending on his part...snore away! LOL.

Betty Carlson said...

I love the closer to this poem! Just when I thought it was the height of romantic passion...

Inconsequential said...

Excellent! at least he didn't leave the money on the table and go home to his wife...


Great write again :)

Anonymous said...

Very clever, enjoyed this very much;)

anthonynorth said...

Excellent piece - sound effects and all!

paisley said...

kind of brings one back to the boring reality of it all doesn't it......

Devil Mood said...

hehe the ending is brilliant! But I really liked the sensual dimension of it, the shadows of the eyelashes, very nice :)))

ChefDruck said...

Snoring away to glory. Great ending. Perfect contrast.

Lifeless in Ohio said...

Very good indeed - and I agree with Rose.

Forgetfulone said...

Excellent use of the prompt! Enjoyed your wonderful poem.

sage said...

Nicely done--a gentle slam on the male gender for falling asleep afterwards :)

Maybe if my sinuses clear up, I'll write on this topic today.

January said...

Great ending! Definitely full of passion.

a mouthy irish woman? ridiculous! said...

and that's the way it is. great post yet again!

Anonymous said...

Wonderful poem that caught the "truth" of the ending perfectly.

Goodnight, Mom said...

Yes, I had this very romantic sweeping scenario on my head strongly contrasted with that shot of reality.

Great poem.

Linda Jacobs said...

The sad thing is, I wasn't even sruprised by the ending! What's that say about my love life?

Really, really well-written!

aMus said...

ahh a poem with a twist..or was it a twist..;)

really loved the lines *lashes casting chequered shadows
on silken smooth cheeks*

in facet evrything about it...
:)

Tumblewords: said...

Oh, wow! this one was so much fun! Passion-ed even!

Anonymous said...

just like a man to sleep afterward.

nicely written.

Anonymous said...

This was so beautifully written - palms upward- dewy lips, I felt the rain - you captured the 'wetness' and then what a fun ending...I agree I hope she got what she needed before that started!

little wing writer said...

beautiful...the quiet storm... what no cigarette shared... wonderful that he spoke to her... this was no wham bam thank you mam..

polona said...

oh, that was perfect!